Thought of the Day: Going to a 10:05 movie on a work night is an especially bad idea when you are with your boss. It makes it pretty hard to call in or show up late the next day.
Anyhoooo, I’m working on a retrospective entry about how Ed and I met. It.Is.Exhausting. So I thought I’d do an open letter post---I’ve been seeing them around and they’re kind of fun. So here it goes.
_________________________________________________
Dear Target,
Why did you only have pink snow pants and purple coats? And why didn’t you have any snow pants for boys? Most importantly, how did I not buy what I needed and still spend $60?
Respectfully,
Sara
Dear Office Politics,
YOU SUCK!!
Signed,
SLB
Dear Honey,
Thank you for making an effort to clean up the kitchen so that we could have dinner together at the kitchen table. You making family time a priority means a lot to me.
I love you,
ME.
Dear Jack-Ass Customer,
It really makes no difference that your neighbor Lewis’s taxes went down. No difference at all. We’ll pay what we are billed. Maybe Lewis should shut his trap! But please do tell Lewis we said hi!
Sincerely,
Disgruntled Bank Staff
And P.S. we have no reason to know that your neighbor’s name is Lewis.
Dear Eddie and Caitlyn,
Thank you for waking up at 3:30am and 4:30am after Mommy took Tylenol PM. There is nothing like dealing with grumpy toddlers in the middle of the night when Mommy can barely stand up. I love you anyway and enjoyed snuggling you.
Hugs and Kisses,
Mommy
Dear Underlings at Work,
If we are busy enough where I am doing your job, you should probably do it too. Nothing pisses me off more than DOING YOUR JOB while I can plainly see you slacking. Shape up or ship out, and I mean it!!
Urgently,
Your Boss.
Dear Snails---
Stop screwing. We don’t want any baby snails. Gary and Larry my ass.
I hate you,
Sara
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
Sara,
You are gonna make me pee my pants. Seriously. Stop it.
Your Bloggy Pal,
Misty
PS Do you know that my family still says, "Baaa ba BAAAA! Mama, I can't see you!" Like at least once a day. Oh, you little trendsetter, you.
Now I need you to write a nasty letter to the wasps that are apparently breeding in my basement.
Help!
ha ha snails ha ha ha ha ha ah
Hahaha these letters are awesome, especially "Gary and Larry my ass." I wrote open letters last week on my blog and wow, does it feel good.
I need to take some NyQuil in the WORST WAY, but AD's sleep schedule has been so jacked that I am SCARED.
Dear Sara,
Your letters are hiliarious. I will write one inspired by you.
Love,
MD
*****
Dear son,
Today you're going to have to shape up or ship out. I mean it. I'm tired of your antics today.
Love,
Your mommy.
Dear daughter,
You are not a teenager, so enough of the teenager attitude. Mommy wants her sweet girl back.
Love, Mom
-----------------
Yep, that felt good. Thanks!
HA!
Also, congratulations, VP!
And, K. got to go see The Bee Movie with her entire class since our stupid elections board lets the Kindergarten building be a voting location.
Dear Elections Board,
I do not like strangers being able to come in and out of my daughter's school. Just because they are registered voters does not mean that they are trustworthy people. Using a Kindergarten building for voting is STUPID.
Love,
Nowheymama
Post a Comment