Crazy Little Thing Called...Life

Taking a bloggy break

2007-12-04T15:04:00.001-05:00

See you soon!

Tradition

2007-11-30T11:37:00.000-05:00

It’s snowing and I’m excited. I love the snow, especially when it comes as we are preparing for Christmas. I’m keeping a few (Christmas) secrets and the snow, crisp air and that Christmas-type feeling make it just a little bit easier to hold out. I’m the type of person that wants to tell you everything. If I know something, I want to share it! Today is not the day though; the day will be Christmas. Friends and families will share the secrets and surprises they’ve kept over the last month or two while their children run around pink-cheeked and excited with the anticipation of opening their gifts.

This is how it always was for me growing up and is probably why I’m still such a sucker for Christmas today. The excitement would start weeks in advance, and by the time Christmas Eve would come along, I could hardly wait to get to my Gramma’s house where we celebrated Polish Wigilia . We always went early and stayed late, spending the entire day talking and laughing, my brothers and I playing Husker Du with our cousins, and the adults laughing and having a good time in the living room and kitchen in to the wee hours of the morning. There was always more food than all of us could eat, whether it was my mother having made pirogies and mushroom soup, or the later years where we just had roast beef and mashed potatoes. I still remember the year we all went out to dinner instead of going to Gramma’s (HEY! Where ya going with that cake?!). I think we all kind of felt cheated out of our Christmas Eve experience, and we never did it again.

Christmas Day was no different; my brother(s) and I waking up at the crack of dawn to see what was left for us under the tree. We were never disappointed. A long running family joke is my mother saying “Christmas won’t be overly spectacular this year….” because no matter what it always was. Christmas evening was spent with my other set of grandparents, on my dad’s side, along with all of my aunts, uncles and cousins. My grandparents were always good for getting us exactly what was on our lists. There was a telescope for me one year, which I used to look at the moon, and another year, when I was in 7th or 8th grade I got my 1st real camera. It was a special gift for me because I shared my grandfather’s passion for taking photos of everyone and everything. In addition to our regular gifts, my grandfather would always give each of us kids an envelope full of cash. $10 when we were younger, much more as we got older. Again though, we stayed late in to the evening, talking, playing and laughing.

Christmas is much different now. For one, all of my grandparents have passed on. For another, the majority of my cousins and I have married, had our own families, and have started our own traditions. We still gather with my mother’s family; usually the Saturday before Christmas, and we have as good of a time as we ever did. The last 2 years have been hard, without my grandmother, who lived for this particular type of gathering—all of the food, family and fun you could ever want, but we’ve done it and we’ve had a great time. This year, our gathering on 12/15, will be extra special because it will include my cousin Bee’s daughter, Jordyn, for the very first time.

Ed and I spend Christmas Eve with his father’s family, another tradition that has been shaken by the death of his favorite uncle 2 years ago on Thanksgiving. Seeing the children, mine and Ed’s cousin’s, together and having a great time though makes it more than worth it. There’s doing shots of Crown with Greg too……(That’s not going to happen this year---I went home and still had to wrap gifts last year and I was wrecked)

Christmas morning has been spectacular for us since the kids came along. Ed and I get up early with the kids and open gifts. Later in the morning, my parents, brothers and SIL along with Ed’s mom and brother come over for a big breakfast and we all open gifts together. The kids, of course, are spoiled, and have a wonderful time. As the afternoon approaches, we head to my uncle’s house and spend the evening with my dad’s family. My cousins and their children trickle in and out as we have dinner and dessert and watch my younger cousins open their gifts.

I think that the point of all of this is that the more traditions change, the more they stay the same. We do all have our own lives now, but it is important to remember where tradition came from, and to keep it going in one form or another for as long as we can. I want my children to have the same fond memories I have of Christmas through the years, and keep them going for their own children……but in their own way.

Golden Goodness

2007-11-29T14:18:00.001-05:00

Ed and I never fight about anything that is consequential. I mean it. We bicker about anything and everything, but when it comes to fighting, it is never about anything that matters. Shall we take today for example? Today we fought about Golden Grahams. Really. Golden Grahams.

When we were going to bed last night, he had asked whether there was any good cereal in the basement. I told him that we had Golden Grahams and he was pleased. This morning I went downstairs to get my work clothes and pop tarts for the kids’ breakfast and seeing them on the shelf, I also grabbed the Golden Grahams.

I went about my regular routine, fed and dressed the kids, and got ready for work. On my way out the door, I casually called out “Hey, I brought up that cereal for you.” For whatever reason, this upset him. Why did I have to say something in front of the kids? Now they will want to eat them. I should have just left them in the basement and he would have gotten them. Of course I have to make some pissy remark like “because you need to eat the whole box??” Finally, I yell “What is your problem!!!!” and he yells the same back at me, to which I reply “STOP YELLING AT ME!!” and he says “NO!”

At this, I go and kiss the kids goodbye and leave in a huff.

How does a situation like this resolve itself, you might ask. It’s really quite simple. Pretend it never happened.

We didn’t talk until almost noon today. He called me to test out the quality of our new phone. Neither of us mentioned the squabble. As I said, it was inconsequential; over before it started really.

When it comes down to the big things, we talk. And talk. And talk some more until everything works out. This is how we function as a couple, and we function well.

Unless it’s about cereal……

Today like totally sucks man....

2007-11-28T13:19:00.000-05:00

1. Do yourself a favor, go out to Starbucks and get yourself a peppermint mocha. TODAY!! Grab a cranberry scone while you’re at it….they’re delicious!
2. Today is one of those days. You know the kind. Where I just want to scream “WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU!!!” at everyone.
3. This was somewhat remedied by a lunchtime trip to Target---They finally had boots in the kid’s sizes. FINALLY. I also bought 5 picture frames. I think I could live at Target. There is a Starbucks inside.
4. Did I mention Ed and I have been cataloguing all of our photos? There’s some funny fricken stuff in there! I have many things in my “to scan” pile.
5. Speaking of fricken, I need to stop saying fricken. Eddie keeps calling people fricken crybabies. He also says “son of a project!!” and I have no idea where that came from.
6. And speaking of Eddie saying funny things…. On our way to my cousins the other night, after Eddie and Caitlyn played with their baby cousin on Thanksgiving, Eddie said to me “so when you have 2 more babies mommy, how many of us will there be?” We probed him on it. “When you have 2 more boy babies. Caitlyn wants to be a big sister.” Oy Vey!
7. Eddie, Caitlyn and I pretended that we were camping last night and told stories in my bed and all went to sleep together. Sounds perfect, right? It was miserable. There were children bouncing off of the walls, screaming and not much sleeping. At one point, Eddie got up out of bed and said he was sleeping in his own bed and was walking around the whole house in the dark. Finally, after much wrangling and a bit of hollering, everyone was asleep before 9:30.
8. I have no idea what we are having for dinner tonight. I meant to put some chicken in the crock pot this morning and never did.
9. My hair is so long right now. I think I like it.
10. Still sipping my mocha. Hopefully today will be smooth sailing from here.

H M M M M M . . . . .

2007-11-27T15:20:00.000-05:00

Well, Shannon tagged me for this MEME and I am super bored just trying to finish my shift at work, so here it goes. Things that make me suspicious, or in Shannon’s words,

Thanks that make me go hmmm….

• The properties of gelatin. Things that congeal totally freak me out. Like spam. Or that fat layer on top of the gravy when it cools.
• Obviously, children who are much too quiet.
• The fact that my local radio station is playing reggae music every morning when my alarm goes off. What are they trying to tell me???
• When my satellite radio craps out, and then kicks back in several minutes later……it still plays the same song even thought the station and my display have long since changed to a new song. There may be Martians in my radio.
• My snails being on top of each other make me VEEEEERY suspicious.
• Anyone who says “Hey! Smell this!”
• My neighbors across the street---I’m pretty sure they are trafficking drugs.

A funny side note, my father-in-law is extremely suspicious of our mailman. If he doesn’t deliver enough mail, it’s because he has a girlfriend down the street or because he has some sort of hidden agenda. If he delivers too much mail it’s because he was stockpiling it so he could deliver it all in one day. If he delivers it early, again with the girlfriend down the street.

What makes you go hmmm?

RECOVERED!!

2007-11-26T15:33:00.000-05:00

I found my lost NaBloPoMo post! She's back in it folks!!!

Catching Up

2007-11-26T11:35:00.001-05:00

So I totally posted yesterday. Really, I did, via phone just as I did all weekend with no problems. Apparently I should have checked though, because my post did not go through. That being said, my NaBloPoMo dreams have been shattered. That’ ok though, right? You were sick of me anyway.

Our weekend, from Thursday straight through yesterday was jam packed. Ed’s mom was having dinner on Thanksgiving around 5, so we got up early and painted the living room. It’s beautiful and sage green and FANCY!! Or “richy” if you’re my father-in-law. I love it; it goes amazingly well with our furniture. We got to my MIL’s at about 4:30 and Ed’s brother and girlfriend were there with the baby---who I am in love with. Eddie and Cait too. They had a great time with her. I’m not sure what the reason was, but we didn’t eat dinner until almost 8:00. Great planning MIL! We got home around 10.

All night on Thursday, Ed was talking about getting up early on Friday to go pick out a laptop. Circuit City had one on sale for $300. I told him he could do what he wanted so long as he didn’t wake me up. So he got up and went and when I woke up he was sound asleep back in bed. When we got up, he said that he hadn’t even gone, and I had no recollection of him leaving, so I believed him---until I went outside and saw a Dunkin cup in the car that I knew was not there the day before. I asked him f he was sure he stayed home and he insisted that he had. Anyway, Eddie got up and asked for some cereal and when I opened the cupboard, there it was, my new Kitchenaid stand mixer. For the last 2 years, any time I’ve mentioned getting one, he’s said no. It’s too expensive. I’ll never use it. So to say that I was shocked would be an understatement. I actually burst in to tears. Over a mixer. I am a lame ass. Anyway, I cooked and Matt and Sarah came over for Thanksgiving dinner and we watched Ocean’s 13. It was a nice night.

Saturday we started going through all of our boxes in the attic, combining and sorting all of that fun. ~~We had a great time reading all of the notes I wrote to Ed in high school.~~ Ed will not get rid of them. I labeled the box they are in “Burn when I die”. First of all, hello hyper active teenager…which I was. Also, it’s no wonder that I didn’t excel in school. I did nothing but write notes. Honestly, 3 notes a day. One of them actually references us having kids some day and me pointing out that I was not interested in having an Edmund Jr. I went through all of the pros and cons and then finally decided that if we had an Edmund, his middle name had to be Roark. I was insane, and I am embarrassed to have these in my house. I did enjoy going through my year books though. Saturday night we went to my cousin’s for her son’s 4th birthday party and we had a good time. She has a 3-week-old baby girl and they named her Alyson—they are calling her Ally for short, which I love. Anyway, Eddie played with Justin’s shake em up race track all night—even during cake which shows how much he liked it—so Ed went out and bought it for Christmas yesterday.

And speaking of yesterday, we didn’t do much of anything. I sorted through all of our old photos and still have a lot more to do today. It feels good getting things done and while all of the reminiscing makes me feel very old, I’m having a good time with that too. I have about 50 posts in my reader, so I’m going to get on that.

Adding to my burn When I die Box

2007-11-25T12:38:00.000-05:00

Any note i ever wrote to ed during High School. GAAH

Happy kids, happy Saturday

2007-11-24T18:01:00.000-05:00

You have a Picture Mail from salybeds@pm.sprint.com

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I am the luckiest girl in the world

2007-11-23T11:33:00.000-05:00

Ed Got me a kitchenaid mixer this am. YAY!
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Sprint PCS Mail

Because it wouldn't be a holiday. . .

2007-11-22T12:38:00.001-05:00

You have a Picture Mail from salybeds@pm.sprint.com

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Without majaor renovation

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Giving Thanks, Sarcasm, and Potty Mouth

2007-11-21T10:55:00.001-05:00

I feel like I should do a “what I am thankful for” entry……but it would be sappy and somewhere along the lines of “I love my kids so much!!” and all like “blah blah blah”. So I’m going to give you a random and somewhat superficial list of items that I would like to give thanks for.

1. I am thankful for the 2 new pair of pants I bought at Old Navy last night, one of which is a comfy pair of straight legged cords that remind me of what a hippie I used to be.
2. Also for the over-the-range microwave we bought last night—what a space saver!
3. I’m thankful that I had the chicken pox when I was 9 as opposed to my youngest brother who has them now at age 18
4. I’m thankful that the kid’s daycare photos finally came in
5. And that they actually turned out really well
6. ~~and that I get to spend $130 to keep them all!!~~
7. I’m thankful for Nestle’s Peppermint Mocha Creamer
8. I’m especially thankful for my 4 day weekend, even though I will only have Sunday to rest
9. I’m thankful that we rented Ocean’s 13 to watch on Friday after dinner—Pitt and Clooney….mmmmmm---happy thanksgiving to me
10. I’m thankful for the bulk sized jar of green olives I bought for turkey sandwiches last night

I could come up with more I’m sure. I’m still feeling a bit out of it. Nothing is particularly wrong; I just feel a bit off. I can’t put my finger on it. Perhaps gorging myself this weekend will assist. Oh, there are other things I wanted to say too!

Eddie has apparently inherited my sarcastic gene! This morning, while waiting for what seemed like hours in the car, while Ed finished a phone call, Eddie goes “What is taking Daddy so long? My friends are already eating lunch….” And a few minutes later “When is daddy getting in the car? My friends are already taking their naps….” Both were said with an eye roll and a hint of a grin. My kid.

I also heard a good potty mouth story this weekend, and it wasn’t my kids! (because they’re too busy singing “Old McDonald had a butt! Poopy Poopy Oh!”)

A friend of mine was outside with his 2-year-old daughter, working in the yard and he saw her approach the front of their house where he had 3 scarecrows lined up for decoration. She got in front of the first one, looked it dead in the eye and slapped it across the face and yelled “BITCH!!”. She moved to the next scarecrow and did the same, and the third scarecrow after that. He could hardly scold her because he was laughing so hard. He was reluctant to even tell anyone the story for fear that they would think his daughter was mimicking him slapping his wife around. It gave me one of the best laughs I’ve had in a long time though.

Ok, I think I’m done now. There is much slacking to be done before I leave today.

2007-11-20T10:39:00.000-05:00

I just feel so cranky today. Not for any particular reason, I just kind of woke up with a chip on my shoulder. Ed was back and forth about driving me to work this morning, and his delay kind of took me over the edge. That and the fact that he chastised Eddie for getting upset this morning when he thought I’d left and forgot to say goodbye. Plus we got in to it over whose return of ill fitting clothing was more important, his since he needs them to wear on Thanksgiving, or mine which I have been holding on to for a while. Clearly mine are just because I’m me, but he thinks that since I have PLENTY of other clothes, his return is more important. Whatever.

So yeah, I’m pissy. I ordered a new phone yesterday, which should make me feel a bit better, but sadly it doesn’t. (I’ve always had Samsung phones, so I’m nervous about the LG……)

So let’s talk about Thanksgiving!

As I mentioned previously, we are going to my MIL’s on Thursday. Because it would complete her, or something. Whatever. She makes a really good green bean casserole with real fried crispy onions as opposed to those from the can. I’m making dessert and can not decide between a standard chocolate pie, made with pudding and cool whip, or a German sweet chocolate pie. Probably the German since it is Ed’s absolute favorite. Unless he gets on my nerves. Then he gets crap.

Friday, I am cooking and my brother and SIL are coming over. It’s kind of our tradition to cook Thanksgiving on the Friday after and I’m somewhat excited. I totally forgot to put in for a vacation day at daycare, so since I have to pay for it, the kids are going—at least for part of the day. That will give me time to cook and clean anyway. Plus it’s our turn to bring home Max, Eddie’s classroom guinea pig. It’s hard to pick him up of the kids don’t go. Anyway, here is what I am cooking:

• One small turkey, deep fried
• One large turkey, in the oven
• 5lbs of mashed potatoes
• One small dish of sweet potato casserole for my FIL (I pretend to like it, but really, it’s all about the marshmallows)
• Corn bread dressing (note to self—cook cornbread weds night or thurs morning)
• Creamed Corn, from the can
• Green Bean Casserole, with canned onions because I like to eat them from the can while I cook
• Canned cranberry sauce because Ed’s dad is the only one who will touch it
• Brown and Serve rolls because it wouldn’t be turkey day without them
• Tons of gravy, of course
• Pumpkin Pie (frozen)
• Apple Pie (maybe fresh but probably frozen)
• Oreo Cheesecake

I think that’s it. Hopefully we will have a ton of leftovers because I love nothing more that a turkey sandwich on plain white bread, slathered in mayo with green olives on it. It is my favorite thanksgiving food. We’ve been known to get up in the middle of the night for a turkey sammie.

Saturday my cousin is having a birthday party for her son, who is turning 4 (plus she just had a new baby girl!!) and hopefully, Sunday we can rest.

Hopefully I’ll be able to keep up with NaBloPoMo during the craziness.

The Poop on Poop Etiquette

2007-11-19T13:54:00.000-05:00

The girls, (and some of the guys) who work with and for me are all very open about their bodily functions. We know everyone’s cycle, about gas and yeast infections…you name it. One of our favorite topics of conversation just happens to be pooping. I don’t know why, we are just enamored with pooping.

There is a stigma around here about pooping at work—at least among the girls. Guys, as you know, have no shame. The majority of people don’t feel like anyone in their right mind should be taking a crap in the same bathroom as 10 other women. I know, it’s not an ideal situation. But seriously?

There are several people here who can’t poop anywhere other than their own bathroom. One goes so far as to say that she can’t even go on vacation. She spends entire weeks miserable and holding it. Then again, she won’t even fart in front of her husband.

Others feel free to poop with reckless abandon. Wherever, whenever, they just go.

Where do you fall in?

A. Sara, I feel very uncomfortable with this line of questioning, please knock it off and write something about your kids or something.
B. I can only poop behind closed doors in the privacy of my own home
C. If I have to go, I have to go. Deal with it.
D. I actually plan on pooping at work, or better yet, at someone else’s house so that I can keep my toilet clean and save on the cost of toilet paper. The less cleaning, the better.

I’d also like to know if you fart in front of your significant other.

Here is my opinion:

I will not go out of my way to poop at work, however, should the need arise; I will not inconvenience my body so that you are not offended. I will however, go to the bathroom at the other end of the building where I am less recognized, and use an intricate pattern of flushing and air freshener spritz to disguise what I am doing all the way down there in the handicapped stall. I will probably wait until the bathroom is pretty close to empty before I exit. On the farting—I’m a firm believer in that if my name appears on the mortgage, I am entitled to pass gas anywhere in my own home. The car too.

Well, I hope your eyes aren’t bleeding from reading this or anything………but it had to be said.

2-year-olds

2007-11-18T10:19:00.000-05:00

We are working in the kids' room today, converting Cait's crib in to a big girl bed. I asked her if she'd like to help me clean up the toys in the bedroom.

She looked at me and said 100% deadpan "I'm really busy working on something. Sorry, can't help you."

She is so my daughter.

Flippers Do Not Go With Dress Pants

2007-11-17T12:38:00.000-05:00

So it’s Saturday, and here I am working of all things. There are about 15 people here who don’t actually work for me, but all of the managers rotate Saturdays. Sadly, I’m not a lot of help to them because I’m so far removed from what they do. But I sure can give them direction! Plus 2 of my associates are here too, and they know a lot more that I do.

So I was wondering, does anyone ever do this? NO, you don’t do it every month based on your cycle, to see what you could potentially have if you were to potentially get pregnant this month? Oh, ok me either. But on the off chance that I did do such a thing, it predicts that I’d have another girl. It’s right for my other kids too. But I should say that I’m not pregnant, because I’m not. At least not that I know of. (NOT THAT YOU KNOW OF……) Seriously though, I’m not. (OR AM I???)

Ed is a member of the Kiwanis and their annual dinner dance is tonight. I didn’t get to go last year (lucky me…er…DARN!) because I was at a friend’s wedding in Syracuse (**note to self, wish Erin a happy anniversary) but we are all going tonight. Which meant that I couldn’t even wear sweats to work on the one day it is acceptable because Ed and the kids are picking me up and we’re going right there. I am wearing my ugly ugly shoes, that actually look kind of like flippers that I bought when I was pregnant with Cait because my feet were so huge……they are a size 9 and are so ugly---but comfy!! My size 7.5 heels are in the car for later.

So, here is a list of things I had to do before coming to work this AM to ensure a smooth transition to our function tonight.
• Feed both children. When can they make their own fricken toast?
• Pack a diaper bag for tonight, just in case either of them pees their pants (I’m not a daredevil, sorry—the grocery store is as far as I go without back-up)
• Leave out clothes acceptable for play today
• Leave out fancier clothes for this evening, and instructions as to what shoes each child should wear
• Instruct Ed to wear some of the new clothes we bought him last week, rather than the same khakis and polo shirt
• Pack Cait’s brush and pony tail holders so that I can do her hair in the car
• Tell Ed to make sure they both have clean hands and faces before they leave (seriously)

And I still got here at 9. Oh happy day!! It’s 12:30 and I have 5 hours to go. So far I have looked at and printed both of our credit reports, perused MySpace and spent about 30 minutes on the phone with Ed. Further down my agenda is writing letters to our insurance company, who still refuses to pay for Ed’s tonsil surgery, citing that it was not medically necessary, and send requests for all of Ed’s medical records to the hospital and doctor. Perhaps some online shopping, lunch, and general screwing around will help to pass the time.

I’m going to start in on lunch now, but I’m sure I’ll be rooting back around in here later.

Reminds me of "Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie"

2007-11-16T12:19:00.000-05:00

I took a fancy test today at the urging of blacksheeped that kind of analyzes your personality. It came back that I am an ISFP or Introvert Sensing Feeling Perceiving. The site gives a brief description, but I googled ISFP and came up with this description, which I will copy below. It’s interesting to see how things really do apply to me. I am the type of person who sits back and takes things in before reacting or more likely deciding whether reaction is even necessary. I keep a lot to myself. I think that’s why I like blogging so much, because I say things that I normally wouldn’t.

Ok, so here is the description, and I have removed the items that do not apply to me and have bolded the things that are just SOOOO me. You can see the full description at the above link.

The Artist
As an ISFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion.
ISFPs live in the world of sensation possibilities. They are keenly in tune with the way things look, taste, sound, feel and smell. They have a strong aesthetic appreciation for art, and are likely to be artists in some form, because they are unusually gifted at creating and composing things which will strongly affect the senses. They have a strong set of values, which they strive to consistently meet in their lives. They need to feel as if they're living their lives in accordance with what they feel is right, and will rebel against anything which conflicts with that goal.
ISFPs tend to be quiet and reserved, and difficult to get to know well. They hold back their ideas and opinions except from those who they are closest to. They are likely to be kind, gentle and sensitive in their dealings with others. They are interested in contributing to people's sense of well-being and happiness, and will put a great deal of effort and energy into tasks which they believe in.
ISFPs have a strong affinity for aesthetics and beauty. They're likely to be animal lovers, and to have a true appreciation for the beauties of nature. They're original and independent, and need to have personal space. They value people who take the time to understand the ISFP, and who support the ISFP in pursuing their goals in their own, unique way. People who don't know them well may see their unique way of life as a sign of carefree light-heartedness, but the ISFP actually takes life very seriously, constantly gathering specific information and shifting it through their value systems, in search for clarification and underlying meaning.
ISFPs are action-oriented individuals. They are "doers", and are usually uncomfortable with theorizing concepts and ideas, unless they see a practical application. They learn best in a "hands-on" environment, and consequently may become easily bored with the traditional teaching methods, which emphasize abstract thinking. They do not like impersonal analysis, and are uncomfortable with the idea of making decisions based strictly on logic. Their strong value systems demand that decisions are evaluated against their subjective beliefs, rather than against some objective rules or laws.
ISFPs are extremely perceptive and aware of others. They constantly gather specific information about people, and seek to discover what it means. They are usually penetratingly accurate in their perceptions of others. (I COULD TRPLE BOLD THIS ONE)
ISFPs are warm and sympathetic. They genuinely care about people, and are strongly service-oriented in their desire to please. They have an unusually deep well of caring for those who are close to them, and are likely to show their love through actions, rather than words.
~~ISFPs have no desire to lead or control others,~~ just as they have no desire to be led or controlled by others. They need space and time alone to evaluate the circumstances of their life against their value system, and are likely to respect other people's needs for the same.
The ISFP is likely to not give themself enough credit for the things which they do extremely well. Their strong value systems can lead them to be intensely perfectionist, and cause them to judge themselves with unneccesary harshness.
The ISFP has many special gifts for the world, especially in the areas of creating artistic sensation, and selflessly serving others. Life is not likely to be extremely easy for the ISFP, because they take life so seriously, but they have the tools to make their lives and the lives of those close to them richly rewarding experiences.

It’s interesting, right?

TEST

2007-11-16T11:19:00.001-05:00

Mobile Blogging Test for NABLOPOMO

Help yourself to FREE treats served up daily at the Messenger Café. Stop by today!

2007-11-15T10:55:00.000-05:00

Thursday’s seem to be the days when I write some sort of retrospective. I really want to write about my wedding, but that is better suited for a photo entry. Unfortunately I was married prior to the rampant use of the digital camera, and therefore, I need to scan my photos. The good new: Scanning them was my pregnancy project when I was gestating Eddie!! The bad news: I only made it through the ceremony photos before I either got bored, or decided that my time was better spent consuming mass quantities of Twinkies and Mug Root Beer. I would place bets on the latter. What I’m getting at is that our goal was to throw a kick ass party, and I can’t really tell the story without the awesome reception photos. The reception was complete hysteria and the best party I’ve ever been to…..I will surely tell you about it soon.

For today though, I’ve decided to copy something I read over at dreamgrrl’s which I think is kind of fun.

10 Things I Liked as a Teenager but Don’t Really Care For Now
1. Talking on the phone for hours and hours
2. Breaded chicken patties on buns with mayo
3. having more friends than I could count
4. wearing my dad’s flannel shirts
5. VANS sneakers which I had decorated with pen and marker
6. Dying my hair green with a bingo marker
7. Being obnoxious on purpose
8. shopping for clothes at the Salvation Army
9. wearing hats
10. hanging out at the mall, at least 3 times a week

10 Things I Did Not Like as a Teenager but Do Like Quite a Bit Now
1. Getting up early
2. yogurt
3. being somewhat productive
4. spending time with my family
5. grocery shopping
6. working out
7. camping
8. learning from my mistakes
9. a good glass of wine
10. fancy shoes

10 Things I have Never Liked and Likely Never Will
1. Wearing jewelry
2. doing anything with my hair other than washing and brushing
3. wearing make-up
4. going to the bank or post office
5. ketchup on anything but hotdogs, hamburgers, roast beef, or mac and cheese
6. painting my fingernails
7. cleaning, or any type of housework (you would have died if you saw my room when I was growing up. DIED.)
8. peas. Blech.
9. The History Channel
10. Participating in any sort of sport (unless it’s darts.)

10 Things I Have Always Liked and Probably Always Will
1. Watching more television than any human should be allowed to watch
2. Silly Teenie bopper movies (High School Musical, anyone??)
3. burying my nose in a good book
4. Burger King Whoppers
5. Coffee---have been an addict since I was 14
6. singing, alone or in groups (does anyone want to be in a band with me?)
7. church
8. Planning future baby’s names
9. dry and ridiculous humor
10. Writing

Can Today Be De-Lurking Day?

2007-11-14T11:16:00.001-05:00

If you are here today, regardless of whether or not you read my blog daily, or just happened upon it, please leave me a comment. I'd like to know who visits.

Here are a few questions to answer for me....

How did you get here? Another blog? Am I in your reader? Did you google something crazy like ketchup in goulash? (That brings a lot of people over.)

What is your position on babies and pacifiers?

What is your favorite television show and why?

What is your favorite song at the moment?

I will answer my own questions. I had/have a blog on another site. No, you can't read it....but I began blogging here after reading Catherine Newman's blog

I am not a fan of the paci. At all. My kids never used them. (Cait sucks on her blankie though) Ed and I both felt strongly about not shoving a plug in our child's mouth, which is not to say that is what most parents do, but you have to admit, it's out there. I have a hard time seeing a 4-year-old with a binky as well. It drives me nuts.

Favorite TV show.....right now? How I Met Your Mother. I love it like no other. And also Samantha Who, it's very smart and funny.

Favorite Song at the moment: Matchbox 20, Let's See How Far We've Come. LOOOVE It!! It's so catchy. A bit trendy fr my usual taste, but like I said, LOOOOVE IT!

Ok, so please de-lurk. All of you!

Tuesday Feels Like Monday (and actually sucks a little bit more)

2007-11-13T12:52:00.000-05:00

1. Ahh, everyone is writing about their weddings. I need to write a wedding post, I imagine. It would need photos though, and those are housed at home. So, another day.

2. A few people questioned my writing of “I feed a family of 5” yesterday. Maybe I’ve never clarified that my FIL lives with us. He is retired and we buy the groceries. He watches the kids enough where it is a wash. He’ll pick p the occasional loaf of bread or gallon of milk, but he figures in to my grocery budget as much as anyone else.

3. Today is one of those days where I’m dying to have another baby…and I’m not even ovulating. It’s just that everyone around me seems to be so deliciously pregnant. And I’m jealous. I don’t think it would go away even if I had 5 kids. Humph.

4. Today is Tuesday which means that Ed is home with the kids. He’s trying to cut down a tree in our back yard that was already dying, but was destroyed by last year’s October storm. I’m not sure how that will all work out, but here’s to hoping.

5. It’s 60 degrees today but I am bundled in my sweater. This cold just will not go away. And I think I have pink eye, or at least the beginning of it. Good thing I sandbagged drops from last year. I’ve been loading myself up all day.

6. I’ve already eaten my lunch but I’m very hungry. Nothing even sounds good though.

7. Ok, let’s take my depressing butt out of here. Maybe a happy wedding entry tonight.

What day is it?

2007-11-12T22:10:00.001-05:00

I ended up having a busier day then I thought I would today. I could not get to sleep for the life of me last night and ended up passing out on the couch waiting for Jon ad Kate Plus 8 to come on. Of course, as soon as I heard Kate's voice, I woke right up. She is one miserable woman. M I S E R A B L E . I ended up back asleep within minutes and before I knew it, it was 3AM and Eddie was sleeping on top of me. I put him to bed, and went to bed myself just as Ed came home so I ended up being awake until nearly 4.

When I dropped the kids off at school this morning I had every intention of coming home and sleeping for a while, but Ed suggested breakfast, and we went from there. I got the kids their winter coats. The sets with the snow pants at JC Penny were marked down from $70 to $31.99. Eddie's is an army green and Cait's is lime green. Both are adorable. Ed got some clothes as well, and we got underwear for Eddie and a rolling Dora back pack for Caitlyn.

From there, we went over to Best Buy to look at camcorders, since ours is ancient. We didn't buy, but got some good ideas. We kind of want one that takes stills as well as videos, but we don't necessarily want to pay $800 for it. So we'll keep looking...

I dropped E off at home because he was worn out and then headed to Target to look for winter boots, hats and mittens for the kids. I got all but the boots which were mysteriously sold out in girls size 7 and boys size 12. Got Cait a few things on clearance too.

From there I went grocery shopping and spent $300. $303.93 to be exact. I do feed a family of 5 you know...plus there were a lot of great deals and I had really good coupons. I saved over $80. Ed doesn't hear that though, he hears $300 on groceries.

I unloaded the car, threw dinner in the oven, picked up the kids and we all sat down to eat before Ed left for work. We've done amazingly well with this eating in the kitchen jazz. Oddly enough, it seems to help the kids clean their plates. It seems the television was distracting them. Who knew??

I finally got the kids in bed close to 9:00 because I was waiting for Caitlyn to poop, and here I am, pooped myself. (can I tell you how great it is to not worry about buying diapers any longer??? She even stays dry at night--for which it is difficult to praise her for since Eddie still does NOT stay dry trough the night) I need to do a few things to get read for work in the morning and then I'll be off to bed. 4 day work weeks tend to suck for me, having to jam in 5 days worth of work in to 4....but then again I'm working this Saturday so maybe that will make up for it.

I'm a bit crazy tonight thanks to my after dinner coffee with the peppermint mocha creamer that Swistle recommended. It was so good, I could die. Now where am I going to budget in those extra 70 calories? So good.

Ok, I'm spell checking but not proof reading. For your viewing pleasure.

I will write something with substance tomorrow. I promise.

Sunday

2007-11-11T20:42:00.000-05:00

So my ketchup loving MIL came over yesterday. I made chicken fingers for dinner with mashed potatoes and creamed corn. As we were making our plates, Ed asked her if she needed the ketchup. She looked at him with complete disgust. "I would NEVER put ketchup on poultry" she said, as if he were cazy for suggesting it. I could have spit my teeth out. So putting it on pork chops and GOULASH is ok, but never on CHICKEN.

She invited us for Thanksgiving a few weeks ago, and Ed asked her if she would just rather come here so she didn't have the stress of cleaning up her place. (she moved in a few months ago and has yet to unpack and only recently even got a fridge.) After Ed suggested it though, we didn't hear from her for 3 weeks and she wasn't answering her phone. Wehn Ed finally talked to her, and asked her about Thanksgiving again, she sad she'd love it if we came over. Us coming to her house gives her the will to live. So apparently, that's what we're doing. I'll be doing my usual, which is cooking on Friday so that I can eat what I like, and have plenty of left overs for sammies.

It feels very late for some reason. We were up early today, and went out to a train show (yawn) in Batavia. There's an even bigger one out here next week. Hoo-freaking-ray!! Ed left for work around 2:30 though and I did laudry the rest of the day. The kids never napped, so they were in bed and asleep before 8:00, which is more than rare.

This cough continues to kick my butt...it never flares up until bed time and before I know it, I'm sleeping upright on the couch. I'll probably just start out there tonight since Ed won't be home until the morning.

I guess that's about it. I'm quite looking forward to tomorrow--I am off of work and the kids are going to daycare. I'll be gorcery shopping alone, which is probably my all time favorite activity.

I have 5 minutes until Desperate Housewives, so I'm off for now!

Halloween Photos---finally

2007-11-10T11:57:00.001-05:00

Thought of the Day: I truly am the world's biggest slacker.

But here they are, without further ado.... (I know you've been on the edge of your seat)

(it says "I left my princess costume at home.)

Mommy Daisy's Cookies

Our pumpkins

Ed, and Jeff Gordon

Our Witchy Princess

Ok, I have like 14 loads of laundry to do so I'm out for now. Happy Saturday!

2007-11-09T16:41:00.000-05:00

Thought of the Day: Friday---why did it take you so long to get here??????

I feel like I could die, I’m so tired. This cough/cold combo just will not quit. I realized last night that I had cough syrup with codeine left over from last year that I’d never even touched. Sadly, it barely touched the cough, but at least it kept me groggy enough to not really care that I was up all night coughing.

I had my annual OBGYN visit today which was a real hoot. Well ok, that was sarcasm, but it was pretty uneventful. I’m at a quandary because I really like the practice, but the midwife, Wendy, who I actually followed there from my old OBGYN, has left. Wendy is my all time favorite midwife, but I also love the main Dr. at this practice and the other midwife she has on staff is ok, in a jolly old lady sort of way. (Unless you’re waking her at 3:00AM to tell her you’re in labor…then she’ll tell you it may not be labor and to take your time getting to the hospital and be a bit cranky about it. Then she’ll show up just as your baby is CROWNING……) Anyway, I could go off and find Wendy or just stay put. I’m not sure what I want to do, but I’m leaning toward staying with the practice. Like I said though, the visit itself was uneventful; they are refusing to put me on the pill, to Ed’s delight, until I have my next round of blood work and ultrasound for my thyroid. Midwife suggested taking 3000 mg of Vitamin C during my period to ease it up a bit. We’ll see if the natural crap works for a while.

Work has been busy the last few days and I have not had time to read or comment at a lot of blogs. I’m hoping to catch up this weekend.

Not much else to report, about 30 minutes before I go home, so I should at least make my desk not look like it’s been hit by a tornado. (I initially wrote “tomato” instead of “tornado” and burst in to hysterical laughter.)

True Love

2007-11-08T10:52:00.000-05:00

I really enjoyed writing my retrospective last week about my good old ex-Duran Duran haired-boyfriend Mike. I thought that I would tell you about my other ex, Steve, but when I really thought about it, there’s no story. He loved me. I loved him. He loved drugs a lot more than he loved me and that was SO not my bag. We were friends for a very long time, through college, and he often told Ed that he’d always love me. Sometimes I wonder if he still does. Our break-up was what ultimately led me to Ed though, so instead, I’ve decided to write about how Ed and I got together.

It was 1994 and I was in 10th grade. I mean, can you even believe it? 10th grade!! And as I mentioned, I had broken up with Steve. Ed and I rode the same bus and I would sit with him on most days for the ride home. I thought he was a really nice guy, but had no romantic interest in him. At the end of the year, I signed his year book and gave him my number—to be honest, I gave everyone my number—and I never really thought anything of it. I was on the phone with my friend Melissa (the same Melissa we just saw in Maine) one night in July and she mentioned that she and Ed and some other people were going to Darien Lake the next day and that I should come. Soon after, Ed called me himself and invited me, so I took up the task of getting permission from my mother.

I’m still not sure how I finagled that one. My mother wasn’t keen on my riding in cars with other teenagers to begin with, so being allowed to go, with an 18-year-old boy, when I was still just 15, did not hold strong prospects. I’m sure that Melissa being reliable and responsible figured in to it somehow. In any case, it was planned, and we left early the next morning.

I can still remember the entire day, vividly. From Jen being melodramatic about having cramps, to begging Melissa to wear her bikini on the waterslides so I wouldn’t be the only one, to going off with Ed to find power rangers crap for our little brothers who were around 5 at the time and Ed being extremely sick from going on all of the rides with me. We hung out at Melissa’s that night, and from that point on, were pretty much inseparable.

I talked to Marisa the next day, and the first thing she said was “You don’t like him, do you??” It wasn’t a question meaning “what would you possibly see in him…” but more of “he is nothing like any person you have EVER gone out with.” She was right, he wasn’t. He was actually a legitimate nice guy. So I vehemently denied any interest in him other than friendship.

We started speaking on the phone for hours every day, to the point where he would even call me from the pay phone at work and I think that was when my mother started to worry. “He is 18 and you are 15!!” she would say. “He’s nothing but a PUNK!” my brother Matt told me. My family changed their minds about him though after he helped us move and they finally got to know him.

I went away with my friend Staci for a week that summer, down to Virginia Beach. Nothing had happened between Ed and me—I knew that I liked him and thought that he liked me, but he had never said anything, so I thought nothing of trolling for guys up and down the boardwalk. We met A LOT of boys. Cute boys. Beach boys. I found myself talking to a boy named Chris one evening and we ended up sitting on the boardwalk, talking about everything under the sun for hours. We made plans to meet up the following evening and as we said goodbye for the last time, he kissed me. Staci will tell you that we stood there making out for hours while she twiddled her thumbs, but that would just be Staci being Staci. In any case, we did meet up the following evening, and more kissing occurred. We parted ways, exchanging phone numbers and addresses, promising to keep in touch. It was totally TRULUV4EVA.

I came home wildly confused. It wasn’t like I was going to carry on a long distance relationship with random Virginia Beach Guy, but if it was so easy for me to fall for him, was there any substance between Ed and me? Chris and I did exchange letters and we spoke on the phone quite a bit. One of his letters said “You were the prettiest girl I met this summer……” He knew about Ed and me and he had a girl named Angela and we both knew nothing more would ever happen between us. (the last I heard from him maybe a year later was that Angela was pregnant and he was experimenting with crack….yeah.)

Near the end of the summer, I stayed with Melissa at her dad’s for about a week. He was hosting a Woodstock party over the weekend, and had ordered it on Pay Per View. Ed was coming and Melissa mandated that I was going to tell him how I felt and see if he felt the same. The goal was to do it after Aerosmith performed. Ed had to work the next morning, but was staying the night, so after Aerosmith, I went down to his car with him to get his alarm clock. This was when everything was supposed to happen, but I—the eternal chicken—couldn’t say anything. It actually kind of sucked. We all went to bed and Ed left around 6:00AM for work.

Melissa called him the next evening and talked with him while I was cleaning up our room. She came in with the phone and handed it to me. “Talk to Ed”, she said. I thought I was going to throw up. I could barely take the phone. I did though, and he asked me to be his girlfriend. The rest is history.

This past August Ed and I were together for 13 years. We were very young when we started dating, but somehow we both knew that we were it for each other. I don’t really think that either of us has wondered what it would be like if we were single at any given point; we really are meant to be together.

I kind of feel like we have a certain advantage over other couples, having grown up together in a sense, we know everything about each other because we’ve experienced it together. Not much else could create a stronger bond.

Fodder (A MEME!!)

2007-11-07T14:33:00.000-05:00

Thought of the Day: Fodder Fodder Fodder

Four jobs I've had:
1. Hostess at Country Kitchen
2.Trainer for Boston Market
3.Manager at Blockbuster
4.Sales girl at Fredericks of Hollywood

Four movies I could watch over and over:
1. Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me
2. She’s All That
3. The Negotiator
4. Beautiful Girls-1996 Seriously, watch it!

Four TV shows I like - reality version:
I don’t do a lot of reality TV but here is what I like
1. Scott Baio is 45 and Single
2. American Idol.
3. Dirty Jobs---mmmmmm I love you Mike Rowe.
4. Mythbusters

Four TV shows that I like - non-reality version
1. The Office (though I’ve seen it only once this season)
2. How I Met Your Mother
3. The New Adventures of Old Christine
4. Seinfeld (I watch it every night before bed)

Four places I've gone on vacation:
1. Port Colborne, Ontario Canada (Long Beach on Lake Erie)
2. Ohio—Cedar Point and The Islands
3. Virginia Beach, baby!
4. The White Mountains of New Hampshire

Four favorite foods:
1. Fresh baked bread or rolls with tons of butter
2. Breaded Pork Chops (mine—nobody else’s)
3. Pizza and Wings with Bleu Cheese
4. Anything that is chocolate or peanut butter or a combination of the 2

Four web sites I visit daily:
1. Google/Gmail
2. My blog
3. Hotmail/MSN
4. my bank’s site

Four places I would rather be:
1. Home in a Nyquil induced coma
2. Disney World, because I have never been there.
3. Vegas because I’ve never been there
4. Starbucks sipping coffee

Four bloggers I tag:
I'll take my chances with:
1. Bee
2. Em
3. Sarah
4. YOU!

Open Letters--Feel Free to Add Your Gripe

2007-11-06T16:24:00.001-05:00

Thought of the Day: Going to a 10:05 movie on a work night is an especially bad idea when you are with your boss. It makes it pretty hard to call in or show up late the next day.

Anyhoooo, I’m working on a retrospective entry about how Ed and I met. It.Is.Exhausting. So I thought I’d do an open letter post---I’ve been seeing them around and they’re kind of fun. So here it goes.

_________________________________________________

Dear Target,
Why did you only have pink snow pants and purple coats? And why didn’t you have any snow pants for boys? Most importantly, how did I not buy what I needed and still spend $60?

Respectfully,
Sara

Dear Office Politics,
YOU SUCK!!

Signed,
SLB

Dear Honey,
Thank you for making an effort to clean up the kitchen so that we could have dinner together at the kitchen table. You making family time a priority means a lot to me.

I love you,
ME.

Dear Jack-Ass Customer,
It really makes no difference that your neighbor Lewis’s taxes went down. No difference at all. We’ll pay what we are billed. Maybe Lewis should shut his trap! But please do tell Lewis we said hi!

Sincerely,
Disgruntled Bank Staff

And P.S. we have no reason to know that your neighbor’s name is Lewis.

Dear Eddie and Caitlyn,

Thank you for waking up at 3:30am and 4:30am after Mommy took Tylenol PM. There is nothing like dealing with grumpy toddlers in the middle of the night when Mommy can barely stand up. I love you anyway and enjoyed snuggling you.

Hugs and Kisses,
Mommy

Dear Underlings at Work,

If we are busy enough where I am doing your job, you should probably do it too. Nothing pisses me off more than DOING YOUR JOB while I can plainly see you slacking. Shape up or ship out, and I mean it!!

Urgently,
Your Boss.

Dear Snails---
Stop screwing. We don’t want any baby snails. Gary and Larry my ass.

I hate you,
Sara

2007-11-05T12:07:00.001-05:00

Thought of the day: Sunday is by far my favorite day of the week. This also means that today, being Monday, sucks.

***Edited to say that Caitlyn wore underwear all weekend!! One small accident early Saturday! She went to daycare in undies today!

We actually had a pretty fabulous weekend from Friday straight through yesterday. I booked home from work on Friday to get Ed and the kids, and we went to see “Bee Movie” which was pretty cute. From there, we went to Toys R Us to buy the kids Power Wheels because they were discounted quite a bit and we figured we’d get them now while they could still use them as opposed to waiting until Christmas when they’d have to sit around for months. We had a quick dinner at Applebee’s and got home around 11:00, with both kids still being wide awake.

Ed worked Saturday morning and the kids slept in until 9:30! Ok, well actually, Eddie was up at 7, but went back to sleep on top of me on the couch until 9:30. In any case it was a bonus for me because I went to bed at my usual time and slept about 2 hours later than usual. I sat around drinking coffee and catching up on my TiVo while the kids played for a few hours and when Ed came home, we started in on the house. He went outside to build the rest of my furniture, and I tore apart the kitchen. Why we have so much Tupperware, I will never know. But I packed it- and half of my baking dishes away in the basement. I tore apart our utensil drawers as well, and now you can actually open and close them without losing a finger. The next kitchen project involves an over-the-range microwave and moving the cabinets that I acquired from my Gramma over to where our coats are now. If we can do this we may be able to accomplish something that is unheard of in our house---eating meals in the kitchen. We ended up in bed pretty early on Saturday sleeping so late stopped the kids from napping.

Ed got up with the kids yesterday morning so I could sleep for a while. I had been fighting a cold all weekend and woke up with 100% no voice. Nothing. (it did come back after a while) Ed made coffee and chocolate chip pancakes and let me just sit and relax, which was really nice. He and the kids went outside while I showered, and when I put Cait in for her nap around noon, Eddie and I went to a craft show at our local fairgrounds. I was hoping to find Christmas ornaments, but I didn’t really like what they had, so we had kettle corn, walked around for a bit, and I took him for lunch before we went grocery shopping. It was really nice to spend time with Eddie alone. So often it’s just Cait and me while Eddie goes off with Ed or FIL, so having a mama’s boy for the day was good for me.

This of course leads us to today where I am sick, and at work. This morning has been horrendous, so I’m hoping for a much better afternoon.

2007-11-04T11:44:00.000-05:00

Thought of the day: I've waited too long to post Halloween Photos.....

But my computer is being dumb and won't let me do it. Perhaps tomorrow.

We are off to a craft show and then grocery shopping---the perfect Sunday in my book.

2007-11-03T15:19:00.000-04:00

Thought of the Day: Going from not caring about your house, to caring, really kind of sucks.

**but the woodwork will not be black.

2007-11-02T13:31:00.001-04:00

Thought of the Day: So I guess all of the ~~reading and commenting on blogs all day long~~ hard work finally paid off. I was named an Assistant Vice President yesterday. I feel like such a BIG SHOT!!

I’ll have to admit that when I started here, nearly 8 years ago, I did not intend for this to be a long term job. At the time, I needed to get out of hell at Blockbuster, and my godmother was constantly telling me that I should apply here; she could get me in. When I finally reached my breaking point at BBV, I dropped off my resume here and the rest is pretty much history.

I started as a call center agent, answering inquiries from customer about there mortgage and my shift was 12:15 to 9:00 PM. This wasn’t really a bad thing at the time---I was 21, not married, no kids and having such a late start allowed me to stay out until all hours of the morning and still respectfully drag my sorry butt in to work the next day (somewhat anyway). 8 months in to the job I was promoted to an escalations associate and began handling supervisor calls and escalations. I was in that position for 2 years and was working days before being promoted to management and going back on the 12:15-9 shift. Once again though, the shift came at a good time; I was about 7 months pregnant with Eddie and could use the extra sleep. I started by managing a general team which handled general inquiries, before moving to manage a team who handled our high profile customers and later managed a sales team over the course of a year and a half. In March of 2005, while pregnant with Caitlyn, I took my current job of managing escalation associates, which I have detailed here.

For not intending to keep this job, I sure have come a long way. And for someone like me, who is a known slacker, this is a big deal.

2007-11-01T10:59:00.000-04:00

Thought of the Day: To this day, I can not hear a Duran Duran song without being reminded of my ex-boyfriend Mike.

I couldn’t even tell you how we initially met; we kind of ran with different crowds. He was a sort of dangerous type with long blonde seventies style hair (Even though it was 1993), and back then, in 10th grade, I was kind of a cute preppy girl on my way to being a laid back slacker hippie type. In any case, one night in October, I found myself at the movies alone with 5 guys.

While it probably should have, this didn’t make me uncomfortable, of course when my other friend Mike (not to be confused with ex-boyfriend Mike) said “a bunch of us are going to see A Nightmare Before Christmas…” I’d assumed it was a co-ed group. When I showed up at our small town cinema though, I was greeted by friend Mike, Ben-whom I had known since 7th grade but wasn’t a good friend of his (incidentally, Ben and I became pretty much inseparable senior year but that is a story for a different day.), Ex-boyfriend (but soon to be current boyfriend) Mike, this guy Derek and Ex Mike’s brother Bob.

I ended up sitting in between the 2 Mikes and by the time the movie was over, Ex Mike and I were holding hands. Adorable, right? When the movie was over, his grandfather was waiting outside for him already, so he ran out yelling behind him to make sure that I gave him my number at school the next day.

I remember calling Marisa that night to tell her what had happened and I think that she was a little bit weirded out. He was a weird kind of guy, but in a nice way. And I was that girl who was looking for anything but normal. Marisa knew this, and she always supported me in my endeavors, but I think she was cautious on my behalf.

Mike and I spoke at school and on the phone for about a week before starting to date on November 9th. Our courtship consisted of lengthy phone calls, many trips to the movies where we made out like teenagers (appropriately), and skipping 1st and second period to go out for breakfast. Our truancy officer, Mr. Cooper, got to know us by name and usually picked us up while we were walking back to school. He never turned us in for skipping as long as we were signed back in by 9:00.

Midway through our courtship, Mike had his hair cut. I remember him calling me on a Sunday afternoon, begging me to guess what he had done that day. He finally told me what he had done, and that his family told him he looked like Bryan Adams. On Monday at school, I was greeted by Mike with this modified skater type hair cut that hung dangerously in to his eyes. It was so eighties, I could have died. Marisa passed me a note saying that he looked like he belonged in Duran Duran. To this day she has not let it go. (If I can find the photo of all of us before our winter dance, The Holly Hop, I will totally post it. He wore a green suit to match my green dress. KLASSY)

Sadly, Mike and I broke up in March but vowed, as teenagers tend to do, to be friends. We’d had a great time, going to school dances, sledding and to many of my friends parties together, but our relationship had just run its course. We ended up friends by association in the long run because his sister and I became good friends.

Mike had his first daughter just after we graduated, and now is married with 3 girls. He ran in to Ed a while back too.

Its funny how something that was so big back then, is so insignificant now. I was sure it was the end of the world when we broke up, but at age 15, what isn’t the end of the world?

He may remind Marisa of Duran Duran, but he’ll always be Bryan Adams to me.

Happy Haloweeeeeenie!!

2007-10-31T10:32:00.001-04:00

Look at us last year!! I can’t wait to post this evening’s photos. Eddie is loving life as Jeff Gordon and Caitlyn is a very good witch. We even dropped Eddie off with no tears this morning. I hope your day is filled with doughnuts, cider, and SPOOKTACULAR fun! Mwaaaaah haaaah haaa haaah!!

Random List Post (on weight, diet, baby names, child spacing, you name it!) I'm everywhere today!!

2007-10-30T11:50:00.000-04:00

It so feels like Wednesday to me today. I don’t know why. I feel out of sorts. Maybe because I went to the gym this morning and I usually (by usually I mean last week) go MWF? I don’t know. In any case this will be a list post, because I really like lists, but also because I’m feeling a bit lazy.

1. Speaking of the gym, I’ve been going for a week and at least paying attention to what I eat, and I have lost one tiny pound. One. I wish there was some way to see immediate results. I wish I was the type of person who could do one of those crazy liquid diets. I wish that I could somehow get the lbs. to melt away. It doesn’t work that way though, huh.
2. Speaking of weight loss, I causally mentioned to Ed that I was going back on the pill because I don’t want an unplanned pregnancy to get in the way of my weight loss goals. (I have an appointment 11/9) He was actually kind of upset with me about it. He kind of thought we’d have another baby sooner than later. Well ok then. We disagree. I’m not canceling the appointment, but I will have a serious discussion with him before I start the pill. Who knew??
3. Eddie and Caitlyn were spitting last night. Their dinner, their beverages, just plain spit, you name it. They were out of control. At one point, I said to Eddie sternly “We do not spit in this house” and he said “Well can we spit in other peoples houses?” I had to walk away so he wouldn’t see me laughing.
4. I’m tired of my job and the shenanigans that go on. That’s all I have to say about that.
5. Caitlyn is on day 5 of being dry. She ran back and forth from the bathroom all last night saying that she needed to poop, but couldn’t get it out. She went in her pull-up right before bed and was actually upset about it. Today is a new day!!
6. Our local park is having an enchanted forest tonight and my FIL and I are taking the kids to walk through. I think they’ll enjoy it. Plus they get to try out their costumes before wearing them to school tomorrow.
7. Eddie still hates school in case you were wondering. He keeps asking for Ed to go with to drop him off, and I know it’s because Ed will stay and I will not. Ed can’t say no though, and usually follows us over. I kiss both kids goodbye and go. Ed has usually just left Eddie by the time my 20 minute commute to work ends. Now even at home, he wants to know where I am all the time—and says things like “Mommy, don’t leave me!!” when I put him to bed or am in the kitchen or something. I wish I knew what to do. I’m sure it’s not stay by his side for life, which is totally my inclination right now. I just feel like “my poor poor baby….” All of the time.
8. It’s supposed to be 70 degrees tomorrow for trick or teat---how awesome is that? I have to pick up crap for the kids to take to school tomorrow for their party and parade and now apparently for an impromptu Halloween party at work. I should have saved the pumpkin cookies (which are FRICKEN AWESOME!!) for tomorrow.
9. Did I happen to mention that we took all of the chocolate candy the kids got last Halloween and put it in the freezer? We have every intention of passing it out tomorrow night. Is that wrong in some way? It was all standard sealed chocolate; we didn’t save gummies or anything, so I think it should be fine. They weren’t going to eat it all.
10. I’d love to know what everyone is dressing their kids as for Halloween, or better yet, I’d like to see photos.
11. FINALLY!! I happened to hear a girls name on the radio this morning and immediately decided it was my new 2nd or 3rd favorite name for a girl. Do you want to hear it? No really, do you? It’s a name Ed would never go for, but I love it. Are you ready? It’s Sabina. I think it’s so pretty! Sabina. It makes me smile.

TTFN!!!

Blah

2007-10-29T16:16:00.000-04:00

I don’t know what is going on today, you know, being expected to work rather than peruse blogs all day long, but here it is 4:00 and I’m finally writing when there is very little time left in my day.

I’m actually kind of sick. My throat started feeling a little bit scratchy and I felt a bit off (well more so that usual) yesterday so on my way home from the baby shower I was at, I picked up some NyQuil. I bought the capsules rather than the liquid, and somehow convinced myself that they were not working--like unless I physically tasted the green syrupy black licorice magic, the medicine just wouldn’t work--and was up all night. It could just be that I only took half of a dose, but I think I’ll pawn the capsules off on Ed and pick up a jug of NyQuil to drown away my ~~sorrows~~ sickness.

Our weekend was productive in an odd sort of way. We spent Saturday driving around to furniture stores for no actual reason. We are considering a breakfast nook for our kitchen and bunk beds (bump beds if you are Eddie) for the kids’ room. We went to the far away pumpkin farm as well, in search of my cookies and they did not have them. I will be making cookies tonight a la Mommy Daisy because I just can’t wait any longer. I can pawn them off at work as Halloween Treats and not buy any candy for my associates either.

After the baby shower yesterday, we carved pumpkins and I did oven fried chicken for dinner, (The recipe is on the back of the bisquick box, and is a favorite in our house) and bathed the kids. It was a pretty laid back kind of night. For what it was worth ( = not much) I was in bed by 10.

I saved the best for last though……Cait has been peeing AND pooping on the potty exclusively since Friday. She even woke us me up at 5:00 AM Saturday screaming “MOMMY!!! I NEED TO GO PEE!!!!!” Her pull up was dry, and she peed and went back to bed. It was like the flick of a switch, and she was done peeing in diapers. I’m so proud of my baby girl. Now if we could only get her brother to stay dry through the night. That’s a story for a different day though.

I’m looking forward to seeing photos of all the mini ghouls and goblins out here in bloggy land, and I’ll be posting a few of my own as well.

Hooray for Halloween!!

R A I N B O W

2007-10-26T13:44:00.000-04:00

Like I mentioned yesterday, today was picture day at daycare. I’ve been apprehensive all day because 2 years ago, Eddie wouldn’t even go in to the room to have his picture taken (I was still on maternity leave with Cait, so she didn’t go at all) and last year both kids gave the people a really hard time—though Eddie eventually sat and smiled when they gave him one of their props to hold. Caitlyn though, was hysterical, and when they did get her to sit, she stared blankly at the camera, teas in her eyes, and snot dripping out of her nose. I have these photos displayed proudly on my desk though, because they do capture the kid’s true personalities. In any case, I hope it goes better today. They have a nice autumn background and I dressed the kids in jeans (Cait in a denim jumper) and Eddie in an orange striped shirt and Cait in a pinky/orangey and brown striped shirt. If it goes well, they will be adorable photos.

We’ve been having a really hard time with Eddie at drop off. He screams, and cries and carries on uncontrollably, saying “I want my Mommy…” or “I don’t like school!!” He’s been telling me that he misses the old school and wants to go back. I’ve asked him if the teacher is mean, or if someone is hurting him and he says no. I asked him if he gets in trouble, and he says no. Teacher says he is usually fine soon after we leave, but his anxiety really concerns me. He was doing a whole lot better until we went on vacation, and then he was sick for 4 days, so there was a good chunk of time where he was home. I don’t know if he feels like if he carries on enough, we’ll figure something out and take him home? Or if he really just hates it there? Or if he’s going through something that he can’t express? He hasn’t had any sort of separation anxiety since he was 18 months old, so I am at a complete loss as to what to do with him. I tend to make goodbyes quick, leaving him there crying. It kills me to do it, but I don’t feel like lingering will help anything. (not to mention having to be at work) Ed disagrees---wants to have him somewhat calmed down before we go and is actually horrified that I would just leave him there. In general, the whole situation sucks.

Caitlyn is easy though, like she always has been. She smiles, and goes off to play, or sits down to breakfast waving goodbye. Calling after us “BYE Mommy and Daddy!!!” She can’t get us out the door soon enough and generally doesn’t want to leave at the end of the day either.

Complete opposite ends of the spectrum.

Retail Therapy and Crappy Diet Crap (stooopid DIET!!)

2007-10-25T16:23:00.001-04:00

Somehow the PMS comes on right about the time that I start to diet. It is inevitable and sometimes just seems like a cruel trick—you know like there’s good old Mother Nature clasping her hands together and cackling like a crazy person. “You will be large and in charge for ETERNITY!!! AAAHH HA HAHAHAHAHA!!!”

Seriously though. I was running errands on my lunch break (more on that later) and on my way out of the bank, all of the smells from the Mexican place, Chinese place and pizza place were wafting out in to the already yummy crisp autumn air, and I could have died. All the fried, greasy wonderfulness I could ever want….all in one plaza. There’s actually a donut shop there too. And a deli.

I sucked it up though, and headed back to work where I thoroughly enjoyed my homemade salad and Lean Gourmet Spaghetti and Mushrooms along with my XXX Vitamin Water. Not fully satisfied, I chased it with a peanut butter Twix. Ok, 2 peanut butter Twix.

What the hell, right?

Anyhoo, I had to go to Babies R Us on my lunch break to get a gift for my cousin’s baby momma’s shower this weekend. I swear, just driving by that store, my checking account becomes depleted. I bought the gift my SIL and I decided on and then just had to look at the clothes. They had full outfits for $9.99. I got 2 for Cait (one that is jeans embellished with blue cloth and a blue hoodie and the other is pink leopard print leggings with matching pink that has a leopard print kitty on it---in case you were wondering). I also grabbed pull-ups and wipes while I was there, making my grand total around $100.

In other shopping news, I scored 35% off of the clearance prices on line for the rest of the furniture we got for our living room. The bad news is that it costs $60 to ship, but the discount was about $73 so it kind of evens out. I’m so excited to have matching furniture that I can’t even believe it. We’re in negotiations about paint in the living room right now though—I want like a grayish green or sunflower yellow, and Ed wants tan. He also wants to paint my woodwork black. I don’t think I’m a fan of that idea. I’ll definitely post photos of the finished product.

Finally, tomorrow is picture day at daycare, and I think that Caitlyn might actually sit this year. Last year she was miserable and crying, and you can see the tears and runny nose in her photo. I have to make a mental note to remember the forms telling them what I want. The folks that come in to do them do a really good job, and they have a really nice set-up. Hopefully, it will all go well.

This means though that there are baths to be had and hair needs to be dried before they lay down tonight, which makes me one busy woman. I’d better finish up work and get out of here!!

6 Habits Meme

2007-10-24T13:17:00.000-04:00

Mommy Daisy tagged me for a meme in which I list 6 habits or facts about myself. I’ve done my 100 facts list as well as an 8 facts list from TFM, so I’m going to focus on my habits, if you will.

1. I set and reset my alarm clock with an OCD-like fierceness. I set it, check to make sure it’s set for the right time, verify am/pm, and then reset it just in case. I do it like 10 times in a row.
2. I am insanely particular about the way my silverware drawer is organized. It must go from left to right, forks, spoons, knives. They must be organized in the dishwasher basket the exact same way.
3. I pop my ears voluntarily all day long.
4. I can never be bothered to remember my wedding ring. I always have really good intentions of putting it on, but it never happens. Until I was pregnant, I never took it off. Now, even if I wear it out, I don’t wear it at home. I’m super clumsy and bang it on things, or I scratch the kids with it.
5. I’m obsessed with getting boogers out of the kid’s noses. Even if they’re not bothering them at all. Even if they are completely non-intrusive. I need to get them out of there.
6. I can’t handle any sort of repetitive sound (idiot bell on the car door) or flashing light (the answering machine). If I hear something I track it down til I find it and make it stop. My employees are required to turn of the volume on their pc’s because any sort of pc noise sends me over the edge.

I'm not tagging anyone specifically, but do it if you are so inclined!

Tuesday Randomness

2007-10-23T17:01:00.000-04:00

1. We bought 2 snails for our fish tank. We now have a baby snail. From what I hear, they multiply more than rabbits. Maybe I’ll start a snail farm. You would think that the pet store would warn us about their spawning. They didn’t.
2. I went to Old Navy on my lunch break to spend the gift certificate I got from my mom and get some clothes for Cait. For some reason Eddie has tons of fall/winter clothes and she has none. Anyway, the store was super picked over so I ended up coming back and ordering some things online. You’re bored with me, right? This is what I got for Cait, and with the exception of the dress which I paid FULL PRICE for (because it is more than adorable), everything was less than $4. I can’t wait for the dress. (I got the black shirt in 3 colors and the pants in 3 colors too)

3. I started using Neutrogena’s complete skin care system and it is finally making a difference. I wrote a while back about how insanely horrible my skin was. I feel a whole lot better now.
4. I joined NaBloPoMo and have committed to posting every day in November. I decided that I am going to do a “Thought of the day” entry every day in addition to whatever regular entries I might write.
5. I saw my sweet niece Samantha for the fist time since July on Sunday. She is so fat and cute in her 6-month-oldness that I can’t stand it. I told my BIL to bring her over any time. What’s one more kid to watch? Eddie and Caitlyn loved her. When I told Caitlyn she was her baby cousin she looked at me with a huge grin and said “Mine Mommy? My baby??” It was adorable.
6. The kids also both had their hair cut on Sunday. Caitlyn now has a cute bob. Very cute.

Finally I just wanted to thank all of you wonderful ladies for your words yesterday. How amazing is it to have this cross country support network of people who know just how I feel? You all make me smile.

P.S. I did not go to the gym today on account of being super sore from yesterday. I always forget how hard the fist week or so is. I will be back tomorrow though. And I ate half a brownie last night. There, I’m being honest.

On Dieting and Weight Loss (and being a lazy slob)

2007-10-22T11:20:00.000-04:00

So I’m dieting again. This comes after realizing that not only have I gained back the weight I lost last winter, I added about 8lbs to that, not to mention the fact that I lost all of the muscle tone that I had built. Almost none of my pants fit and the ones that do are uncomfortable. I am ashamed and disappointed.

I went to the gym at 5:30 this morning, like I did all last winter. I like going in the AM when all of the old people are there, instead of the intimidating body builder types. At least the girl at the front desk remembered me; I have only been there a handful of times since the middle of May.

What is it about the summertime that makes you discard your healthy eating and lifestyle habits? I was really doing well back then and proud of myself because I was sticking with it, and seeing results despite my Thyroid Condition . I felt great, and it was an all around amazing experience. Why then was it so easy to get lazy?

I always hesitate to discuss anything about my weight, dieting or working out because it’s easy to see when I’ve failed. I can’t just arbitrarily say “YES! I’ve lost this much weight!” because you can see the truth. If I commit, and don’t follow through (because let’s face it I’m lazy and extremely fickle) you will know. And you’ll think I’m a failure.

Today feels different though, although my body is alarmed and all like, “What do you mean an apple and sugar free yogurt for breakfast? Where the EFF is my buttered bagel????!!!?!?!!”, I feel good and inspired. At least I have vitamin water to get me through the day.

The non-commitist in me says “I might even go back tomorrow, you know, if I feel like it.”, but I think I probably will. Just don’t judge me if I don’t.

What? You want to know what I bought at Old Navy? Well OK!

2007-10-19T16:47:00.000-04:00

I spent $138 including shipping, but $100 was in the form of a giftcard from my employees for my birthday.

Won't I be the picture of fashion!

I hope everyone out there has a lovely weekend!

You Know You Need To Have It!

2007-10-19T11:12:00.000-04:00

Lazy Perogie Recipe (you know you need to have it)

Per Sarah’s request, here is my affectionately dubbed Lazy-P recipe, which is actually my mother’s recipe in some shape or form because I lost her printed version long ago.

You will need:

1lb box of rotini noodles, cooked al dente
2 2lb bags of sour kraut, drained (I do not rinse my kraut because I enjoy the krauty goodness, but you can rinse it if you want to)
1 very large sweet Vidalia onion (or about 3 small onions but I really like the sweetness the Vidalia provides), diced
3 sticks of butter (you could probably tone down the butter if you needed to, but it makes it SO DELICIOUS!!)
Salt and pepper

Directions:

Pre-heat your oven to 350
Melt one stick of butter in your largest frying pan. Add onion and cook on low until its soft and starting to caramelize.
Once the onions are done, melt another stick of butter in to them and add your sour kraut. Mix onions and kraut. Liberally salt and pepper the mix.
Cook on low for about 45 minutes, stirring occasionally, until it starts to brown. (I usually cook my noodles while the kraut is cooking)
Mix sour kraut and noodles in a large glass baking dish (I like to use my corning ware) salt and pepper to taste and dot the top with remaining butter.
Cover and bake for 30-45 minutes.

Some people like to add cream of mushroom soup or even some polish sausage, but I think it’s much better without it. Call me a Lazy-P purist if you must. I do like it with some smoked polish sausage on the side though.

Ho Hum Wednesday

2007-10-17T15:48:00.000-04:00

Things have been quiet here on the blog front, I know. It seems like everyone has enjoyed the video of Eddie and Caitlyn at the dinner table though. (Bah Bah BAAAAH!) It’s fun that I can put stuff like that in here and give people a feel for what typical life in our house is like………you know, 100% insane.

So what’s been going on?

• We spent the weekend rearranging the living room and bringing in the new furniture we bought. It looks amazing and I can’t even believe how much room we have in our living room now. I also spent some time at the mall on Saturday which was completely over-crowded because the Canadian dollar is matching ours now. Apparently shopping is a lot cheaper in the states. (There was an article in our newspaper comparing prices even though the $$ are worth the same. A trip to Starbucks in Canada runs about $10 where the average is about $6 here.) But anyway, based on the crowds, I’ll probably stay away from the mall on the weekends.
• Vitamin Water has been 10 for $10 at our supermarket this week. YUMM-O
• My team got me an amazing boss’s day gift—a basket with Tim Horton’s coffee, travel mug, gift certificates for Tim Horton’s, wine, chocolates and nuts. They didn’t want to give me 2 gifts in one day so we are celebrating my birthday tomorrow. Lucky me!
• My boss got me a gift card to NY & CO, socks and a necklace for my birthday. Again, lucky me!
• My husband bought me an iPod. I’m returning it. It’s trendy and pink, but I wanted one with a display screen. I can’t even say it was a nice thought because he asked me on Saturday what I even wanted (you know, the day before my birthday). First off, I sent him this on the same day I posted it. Secondly I’ve been dropping the iPod hints for AGES. He gets bonus points for getting up with the kids and taking them out so that I could sleep in—that was great. I don’t even want extravagant gifts or anything like that, but I want what I get to mean something. I plan his gifts out months in advance……I’m beating a dead horse here.
• We did have a nice time at the pumpkin farm on my birthday though. We ended up buying our pumpkins at a roadside stand though because they were picked over and crappy at the farm. The kids really enjoyed the corn maze and hay ride. Last year they had a pumpkin cookie with chocolate chips in it, and they did not this year. It was to die for and I was :SO: disappointed.
• I have way to much work to do to be writing this right now. My head is killing me though and I think it will EXPLODE if I look at another report.
• We’re having a potluck at work tomorrow and I have to make lazy pirogue tonight---which means a trip to the grocery store with the kids since Ed will be in Albany. Maybe we’ll go to Super Target where I can occupy them with pop and popcorn. Probably not though because I don’t think I can get an onion there.

Ok, well 2 hours of work to go. I should probably do some actual work.

If nothing else, they'll drive you crazy

2007-10-15T09:20:00.000-04:00

Dinner time at our house....

My birthday was boring and uneventful. Hooray for being 29.

Autumn through The Years

2007-10-09T21:34:00.000-04:00

2005

2006

2007

Happy 100th Entry To Me--- Your Questions Answered

2007-10-09T15:19:00.000-04:00

For my Hundredth entry, I asked for my readers (all 5 of them) to ask me anything they wanted to know. Thanks to everyone who asked me questions, this was really fun!!

LoriD asked

Have you always lived in Buffalo or are you just drawn to the lake effect snow?

Yes, I have always lived in and around Buffalo. First of course, because this is where my parents chose to live, but as an adult, because we actually like it here. I don’t mind the cold or the snow (much) at all. We have great weather most of the year—it’s been in the 80’s up until today. The only thing that really bothers me is not being able to park on the street from November ‘til March. I’m a FREAK, (I know!!!) but I love to drive in the snow. And secretly, during our EPIC October storm last year, you know, the one where we lost power for 4 days….I had a blast. We pulled our mattress in to the living room and all slept there huddled around each other, lit the stove with matches, ate dinner, slept and even showered by candlelight….and when I needed sanity, we just drove down to Butler, PA to see my brother and SIL. I guess what I’m saying is even when it is really bad, I don’t really mind.

Tessie said “I want to know what you were like as a kid.”

I was extremely talkative (can you believe it?) and from what I understand talked at a very early age. I was also overly sensitive, to an extreme that I have never seen on any other child. You couldn’t even look at me the wrong way or I would burst in to tears. And forget trying to joke with me about anything. This, of course got better as I got older. I’ve loved to sing for as long as I can remember, and have vivid memories of sitting in my bedroom, singing at the top of my lungs.

Mommy Daisy asked:

What kind of work do you do?

I work for one of the largest banks in the world, in the mortgage department. I manage 17 associates who handle escalated issues that regular customer service associates can not handle. In addition, my group is responsible for paying, or not paying as it may be, claims for a high profile mortgage campaign we are running. This gets sticky, because once they say no, I’m the next step. I’ve had call for action news reporters from all over the country call me to try and make things right for concerned citizens. I run several projects and initiatives and represent our area in planning of associate activities---you know to make them feel valued (barf) On top of all of this, I also record my company’s automated system. (Welcome to Big Bank! To continue in English, press 1) You wouldn’t think this was a daily job, but things come up every day where we need to make changes or fixes. One of my favorites is “Due to inclement weather in the Buffalo area, our center is closed today.” The worst part was recording every number through 99 along with hundred, thousand, million, billion, and all of the letters. The recording though, is my favorite thing about my job.

Is that what you'd really like to do?

In a nutshell, no. I’m very good at what I do and that does make my work enjoyable- This is what allows me to spend countless daily hours out here in the bloggosphere. Office politics, however, are not my cup of tea. I’m not the type of person to kiss your ass in order to get what I want. I’m more about earning it….sometimes this doesn’t pan out, and its garbage. I talked with Ed recently about how maybe I’m not happy here and it came down to “what would I like to do instead” and the truth is, I really don’t know. So for now, here I am.

Did you go to college? If so, for what?

I did go to college. Initially, I was going to be a music teacher. Music was what I’d always done, I was really good at it and it made sense. Then like I do with most things, I got bored. I added the boredom to being really horrible at playing the piano and the fact that I would have to transfer far away to complete my degree, I dropped out of the program. I changed my major to elementary education and went with that for a while—again, got bored. Ed and I were living together by then and I decided that it would be more beneficial to work 3 jobs so I dropped out for a semester. I went back, but I could just never get in to the whole “school thing”. After waiting about 2 years, I went back again, this time to a different school and started majoring in business. I worked full time during the day and then took classes for about 3 hours a night and it was excruciating. I stuck with it though, and went for 2 semesters before I got pregnant with Eddie. I didn’t feel like I could balance work, school and being a mom, so I finished the classes I was taking and that was it. In all, I have about 5 years of college, and a ton of credits, about a 3.0 GPA, but no degree to show for it.

The Flying Mum asked

I know your secret desire is to be a rock star, any other wishes as yet unfulfilled?

Hmm, this is a tough one, because being a rock star, or even just being in a band, would be the greatest for me. I love to sing and harmonize and all around perform. There are 2 other things that I would love to do though. One is being an interior decorator. I took a home interiors class in high school and I LOVED it! The thing with that career line though is that you have to be creative, which I am not. I’m all about copying other people’s designs but I couldn’t come up with anything myself. This coupled with the laziness I’ve mentioned is why my own walls are all but bare, and I why I don’t even have curtains, just blinds. The other would be to own a bakery or candy shop. The thing about the bakery is that I suck at cookies. I can do cakes and pies, but my cookies always come out like crapola. I would absolutely love to learn how to make candy though and have some sort of custom candy shoppe.

Misty asked:

1. You said you liked to sing. What do you like to sing? What kinds of musical things have you done in the past? Do you play an instrument as well?

I love to sing EVERYTHING! Songs from the radio, TV jingles, made up songs to the kids…..you name it—my best friend used to joke that I even sing in my sleep. One of my all time favorites is Handel’s Messiah which is an amazing classical chorale piece. Broadway show tunes are also a must. I have them on in the car almost constantly. On the opposite end of the spectrum though, I love singing any of Alanis Morisette’s songs, Meatloaf’s power ballads and the harmony parts to Simon and Garfunkle tunes.

In high school I was in the symphonic chorale and show choir, and had chorus parts in Once upon a Mattress and Hello Dolly. I was also chosen for our All-County Chorus several times. In college I was in the Swing Choir and Chamber Choir. After college, I was in a local community chorus for a while, but the schedule became too demanding for something that was supposed to be recreational. So right now I am not doing anything musical and it kills me.

I do not play an instrument, though I’d like to buckle down and try the piano again, or maybe even the guitar.

2. Do you have names picked out for any future children? What kinds of names do you like?

Do I have names? DO I HAVE NAMES??!! (That’s a yes…) I don’t have any set in stone names. Ed and I both like Olivia and Cally. I like Grace (Gracie), Morgan, and Jenna for girls--Olivia Grace is my #1 girl’s name at the moment followed closely by Jenna Skye (which is the exact name that someone I used to work with named her baby girl, but I don’t really care!!). Boy’s names are really hard for me, but I really like Eric and Andrew….both solid manly names. My # 1 boy’s name used to be Sebastian, but we used it on the cat, so it’s gone now.

3. How much TV would you say you watch a week? What is your absolute favorite show?

I’m sad to say that the amount of time I spend in front of the TV is dwindling. There’s just so much to be done. Not including the Seinfeld reruns I watch religiously before bed each night (or Dora and Diego), I’d say it’s around 2 hours a day, depending on the day. I’m fickle about my ABSOLUTE favorite sow though---usually it’s How I Met Your Mother or The Office. Right now I’m totally in to Damages (does anyone else out there watch this show?) and I can’t wait until Jericho comes back on. My favorite show of all time, like EVA--- Dawson’s Creek. Hands down.

4. If you could do anything for a vocation, what would it be?

Based on my answer about my job and my unfulfilled dreams above, I’d have to say I’m not sure at all. Probably something musical, maybe something with kids. Maybe I’d teach kids music? That might be fun.

5. If you could live anywhere in the world, where do you think you might want to live?

Based on the places I’ve been, I’d have to say New Hampshire. I’d love to retire and just hole up in the mountains somewhere. I really like where we live now though, and I wouldn’t be opposed to living anywhere that was warm and delicious the whole year round.

6. Name 5 things you would do/buy if you won the lottery.

I should start by saying that to win, you actually have to play, and I never play. But lets pretend that I did play and won a huge amount of $$. First, I would quit my job and of course pay off all of my bills—that’s just common sense. I would have our house remodeled and then rent it out (to keep it “in the family”), because even remodeled, I think I would hate it. I would build a new house with a huge kitchen and state of the art appliances and plenty of space for the kids to play and grow up—that has separate in-law quarters. I would donate to a charity that helps abused and underprivileged children and then I’d do something completely frivolous, like send Ed to NASCAR driving school or spend a week with friends only, no husbands allowed, at a luxury resort somewhere in The Bahamas.

7. Why do you blog?

I Blog mostly because I like to write. Part of me is a bit voyeuristic though, I mean, how neat is it that people from all over the world can catch a small glimpse in to my life, and I in to their’s? I kept a blog for 7 years at another site, and actually made some very good friends that I still keep daily contact with. I’m kind of a social retard and don’t make new friends easily out in the real world—I tend to say the wrong thing and people think I’m super weird, or don’t say anything at all and people think I’m a bitch. (Life is so hard after high school.) It’s nice to have a connection with other moms and people both similar to me and different who I normally wouldn’t get to know.

#99 Video Entry

2007-10-07T14:56:00.000-04:00

I am still accepting questions for my 100th entry....I'd love to know what you'd like to know.

Here is the video I tried to post of Caitlyn the other night. Ignore my grating voice.

(and yes, she's always like this) :)

100th Entry---COMING SOON

2007-10-05T12:02:00.000-04:00

Updates on the sick kids? Cait is better and back at daycare. Eddie stopped throwing up at about 10:00 last night but hardly slept a wink, so he’s home with Grandpa. (Goodbye $40)

The real reason for this post is that my 100th entry is fast approaching and I want to do something fun. I’ve already done my 100 facts list, so I was thinking that it might be fun to have you people out there ask me some questions. Anything you want to know? I’ll answer it ! Ask me as many questions as you want!

You can leave your questions in a comment or email them to me at crazylittlethingcalledlife at gmail dot com

I will post questions and answers sometime next week.

Come on! Get started!!

Recipe Thursday

2007-10-04T12:56:00.000-04:00

****edited to say this goes great with triscuits!

I’m too tired for a real entry today since I was up with Eddie and his fever all of last night and somehow still made it in to work today. (The kids are home with Ed today because it’s Thursday, and Eddie is throwing up now. The Joys.)

In any case, here is one of my all time favorite appetizer recipes (per Tessie's Request)and it’s bound to become one of yours:

Hot Banana Pepper Dip

8-10 FRESH (hot) BANANA PEPPERS, DICED (I use about 6 large ones)
3 8-OZ BRICKS OF CREAM CHEESE, SOFTENED
½ CUP CRUMBLY BLUE CHEESE
1 CUP SHREDDED MOZZARELLA
GARLIC POWDER TO TASTE
BREADCRUMBS

Mix all ingredients except for breadcrumbs and spread in baking pan. Top with breadcrumbs. Bake at 375 for 30-40 minutes until heated through and bubbly.

***It pays to wear gloved when you dice your peppers because the “spice” stays on your fingers and gets in your eyes for days. You can also use your gloved hands to mix the ingredients. In my experience it is really hard to stir cream cheese.

P.S. Does anyone know how I can post videos here--and actually have them work? I've tried using the option here on blogger and while they work in preview, they do not work once I've published. I have 2 cute ones of Cait from the zoo that I'd like to share!!

This week (so far) in review

2007-10-03T18:34:00.000-04:00

-Monday--sent kids to daycare and overhauled my living room. BONUS.
-Tuesday-- spent entire day at Toronto Zoo and had a great time...until Caitlyn threw up all over herself, her car seat and the car while we were on the QEW and still more than an hour away from home.
-Tuesday night/Early Wednesday morning--up three times with puking toddler, wondering if I would be working today.
-6:30 Wednesday morning--Wake up to Eddie crying hysterically--he has a 101 temp.
-6:40 Caitlyn wakes up with 100 temp.
-6:45 I call in to work
-7:00 set up camp on the couch with both kids, we sleep until after 8
-8:15, 8:30, 8:45- Caitlyn throws up the little juice I could get her to drink and dry heaves quite a bit.
-8:50 I call daycare to say the kids won't be in (goodbye $80)
-9:00 Eddie eats half a pop tart and decides he is up to going to the store with Grandpa.
-9:00-11:00 Caitlyn and I sleep on the couch---or Caitlyn sleeps and I watch A Baby Story and Bringing Home Baby
-11:00- Caitlyn is sleeping deeply enough for me to lay her on the couch while I pee, make coffee, and toast. She wakes up to have a few bites and asks for her own. She eats half a piece with a tiny bit of juice. Lays on top of me for the next hour. 12:00- Eddie comes home pale and worn out....but Grandpa has bought him a belt and he's excited. I convince both kids to lie down for naps.
2:00 Caitlyn wakes up hysterical but decides she likes being in her crib and goes back to sleep.
2:05 Eddie gets up.....with a 103 temp I wait a few minutes to see if he cools off as he wakes up, but his temp actually goes up. I pump him full of Motrin. He lays on top of me lethargic and listless, falling asleep and waking up for 2 hours.
4:00 We send Grandpa to the store for Cheese, Bread, Milk and of course, cookies. 4:00 Caitlyn wakes up and feels a bit better but will not drink
4:15 I pull out the big guns and offer her a juice box....an ELMO juice box and she takes me up on it.
4:30 Eddie asks for crackers and peanut butter and Cait wants some too. The each eat 2.
4:45 I finally load the dishwasher and Eddie eats a plain piece of bread. Then a cheese sandwich.
5:00 I'm passing out from hunger and I make myself grilled cheese and tomato soup. Caitlyn eats my whole sandwich and 2 crackers.
6:00 Both kids go outside with Grandpa and have now been out there for 50 minutes. 6:50 crossing my fingers....this just might be over.

Because we don't see enough of these guys

2007-09-28T15:49:00.000-04:00

My Cats, Sebastian and Oswald

They are in love :)

Happy Friday!

On Child Spacing (or having more children in general, and when)

2007-09-27T16:48:00.000-04:00

****Disclaimer**** This is written in the form of my train of thought which is a bit crazy, but I think it illustrates my point in the best possible way.

Before I had kids I always said that I wanted four, and I knew exactly how I was going to do it. I would have the first two close together, while I was in my early to mid 20’s, about 2.5 years apart. Ed and I were married when I was 23, and I was pregnant with Eddie soon after I turned 24, right on schedule. I was 25 when he was born. As it happened, Caitlyn came along when Eddie was just 19 months old, but it was close enough to “the plan” for me. I was 26 at the time.

Part two of the master plan involved having babies 3 and 4 in my early 30’s. Baby one and two would be safely off to kindergarten and beyond, eliminating previous childcare costs and it would be like starting over again. It would be perfect. Right?

Then Caitlyn turned 2 and my drive for baby making once again went in to overdrive. OVERDRIVE! But only some of the time. I go back and forth between 2 extremes…the first being MUST MAKE MORE BABIES!! NOW!!! and the other being I can never have any more children. EVER! Two is MORE THAN ENOUGH! I’m using caps to stress how strong the emotions are. And there’s never an in between----I either want them or I don’t on any given day.

I want more kids more often than I don’t though.

I’ll be 29 in 2 weeks. (oh my gawd, TWENTY NINE, barf) All this does is focus me on the fact that soon I’ll be 30. (soon I’ll be 30, I don’t want to be 30……I’ve got some big plans could well have some big hands… [bonus points to anyone who gets that reference (besides my mother)]) {Am I a parentheses genius or what?----no, I’m pretty annoying----I digress} Part of me says “wait until after you are 30 to get pregnant because you can get trashed and forget you are turning 30 for like two weeks!” (Because that is responsible behavior) “Or take a vacation with your best friend to celebrate!” The other part says “probably being pregnant when you are 30 will be a terrific diversion to the fact that you are turning 30. THIRTY!!”

On a completely off the wall side note---I vividly remember my mother turning 30. She was given Oil of Olay, for her wrinkles, because she was old……30. I will knock anyone’s block off who gives me Oil of Olay.

In any case, I anticipate having baby #3 sooner than later. For one, we use no reliable and consistent birth control. The pill makes me feel like ass. And the desire to have another baby completely overwhelms me most of the time. But also, I don’t know. The thought of having these older kids who do their own thing and go to school while I spend all of my time with a baby makes me kind of sad. What if I neglect them because they really don’t need so much attention? The nice thing about having Eddie and Cait so close was that Eddie was so young he still needed a ton of attention. It forced me to be able to balance them and attend to both of their needs almost seamlessly. Maybe this is an irrational fear because I know that I thought I could never love Caitlyn like I love Eddie……and I don’t love them the same because they are totally different kids….but they do share my love equally….you know? Swistle seems to be doing a great job with the balancing of older and younger children, and she has 5 kids (FIVE KIDS) and that reassures me a bit.

In the end what will be, will be and I’m sure that I’ll have a different perspective on the situation once I’m in it. And maybe, just maybe, I need to be in the situation to put it in the right perspective. Until that time though, I’ll put up with the daily freak outs and questioning every aspect of what could possibly be as well as continue with the “third baby envy” of No Whey Mamaand Devan which has pretty much sent me over the edge.

I’ll also count my blessings though because I have to two most amazing and perfect kiddos in the world and if I never had another baby I’d still be the luckiest girl in the world.

Non-Post Thursday

2007-09-27T12:04:00.000-04:00

1. I got my hair cut yesterday---complete with bangs. Nobody has even noticed. I haven’t had bangs since like 7th grade. They’re the long sweeping type bang. I think I like it. I’d like it more if I had touched up my roots and perhaps blow-dried and styled my hair this morning….and we all know that wasn’t going to happen.
2. Have I mentioned that Ed has been staying home with the kids on Tuesdays and Thursdays? He is and is doing a great job. (plus it’s saving us like $160/week on daycare) As long as I leave out clothes for both and diapers and wipes for Cait. All hell broke loose this morning because I forgot and apparently he was unaware of Eddie’s aversion to any pant that is not a wind pant. I directed him to the wind pants (Eddie’s dresser) and the crisis was averted.
3. I have had entirely too much coffee to drink today.
4. I am wearing a pair of those new trendy super dark jeans. They’re cute, but also stink like dye. It’s annoying. I’m also wearing heels with my jeans which I have never done before. I’m such a trendy mom.
5. I’m considering traveling to Georgia in May by myself for my cousin’s wedding. There is no way Ed and the kids could go. I wouldn’t be totally alone as my parents are going but I’d be traveling alone---which is weird.
6. We’re going to The Bill’s game on Sunday as I won free tickets from work. Ed asked if someone was mad at me and compared winning them to winning a pile of crap. He’s pretty much right, but we’ll go and root for them just the same.
7. The reason for this non post is that I’m working on like 4 other entries based around the following:
• Pooping at work
• Child spacing views and how mine don’t fit in with missing this:

• The fact that I’m pretty sure I’m a compulsive eater
• My review of season premier week (I love TV)

Ok, I have much more to do on my lunch break, starting with going to the post office. YIPPEE!

2007-09-26T13:19:00.001-04:00

I'm aware my header looks ridiculous. I'm working on it.

Here In My Car

2007-09-25T10:30:00.000-04:00

Ed drove me to work today which afforded me the opportunity to do one of my favorite things….people watch. It amazes me how people are lured in to this false sense of privacy while they’re in their vehicles. In the 20 minutes we were in the car I saw:

o a man reading the news paper
o a man gingerly stroking his moustache, no doubt marveling at his manliness in that he can grow facial hair
o a woman talking on the phone and applying mascara
o several people in animated phone conversations
o a man shouting in to a walkie talkie style phone while holding a cigarette and steering with his other hand
o The DHL delivery guy attempting to light is cigarette while wearing his leather delivery gloves

As I was watching (and pointing and laughing in my mind) it occurred to me that people are probably doing the same thing to me on a daily basis. I too, for some reason, feel completely uninhibited when I’m in my car.

Here is a random sampling of the things you may see me doing on any number of (ok, probably most) days:

• Turning around frantically to make sure that I actually did drop both kids off at daycare
• Jamming to The Wiggles because it didn’t occur to me to change the CD after dropping the kids off
• Laughing hysterically at (and talking back to) Howard Stern
• Singing at the top of my lungs to either Meatloaf or The Monkees while pretending that I won a contest to be able to sing on stage with them because I know ALL of their lyrics
• Screwing around with my satellite radio (and not looking at the road) because I have horrible reception
• Filing through 100 CD’s (while not looking at the road) to find “the perfect one”
• Having my own animated phone conversation while trying to hide the fact that I’m even on the phone because I don’t have a hands free device.
• Running my fingers through my hair to determine whether or not I brushed it after my shower
• Sniffing my armpits to make sure I am properly deodorized
• And oh crap….did I brush my teeth? I really need to be more organized. I check out my teeth in the rear view mirror
• Trying to figure out how I am going to eat the pumpkin muffin from Starbuck’s that is full of cream cheese without making a huge mess
• Cleaning up the smeared cream cheese from said muffin from the side of my face

But you can’t see me anyway. Right?

Recipe Monday

2007-09-24T12:02:00.000-04:00

After coming home late from Ed’s Aunt Rita’s 90th birthday party on Saturday, we got a late start yesterday. The kids slept until about 8:30, and Ed let me sleep in until about 10:00. We weren’t even done with breakfast until after 12:30. The kids took an early nap and when they got up we decided to take a walk in the park near by that has several nature trails. We saw deer, chipmunks, several types of birds and a ton of wild turkeys. The kids could have taken it or left it, but it was nice to get out and walk.

Target is right down the street so we stopped for “just because” and because I can always use something from Target, and we ended up buying this furniture, (the book case, coffee table and TV stand) and Eddie’s Jeff Gordon Halloween costume.

When we came home I made this recipe and it was delicious! I can’t wait to eat leftovers for dinner tonight. (Paula’s recipe calls for cream of mushroom and sliced mushrooms which would not fly in my house)

Sara’s Variation of Paula Deen’s Chicken Boudine

1.25 lbs boneless chicken breast (cooked and torn in to pieces)
2 lbs egg noodles (cooked and drained)
1 2.25oz package of almonds (toasted in frying pan for a few minutes)
¼ cup drained pimentos
8oz frozen baby broccoli florets
3 cups cheddar cheese
1 can cream of chicken soup
1 can cream of celery soup
¾ cup chicken stock

Toss together chicken, broccoli, almonds and pimentos. Add soup and stock and stir. Fold in 2 cups of the cheese and the noodles. Top with remaining cheese.

Bake in a 350 degree oven about 30 minutes, until bubbly.

(Yes, Ed eats pimentos and almonds…I find it as weird as you do…)

I served it with french rolls and it was SO GOOD!

This is Kind of Neat....

2007-09-19T19:39:00.000-04:00

First of all, please check out my vacation post below. I spent forever on it. :) Secondly, this is too cool not to share. :)

The Vacation Chronicles

2007-09-18T22:40:00.000-04:00

I don’t feel exuberant and wistful looking back on our vacation this time. We had a good time, really we did, but I don’t know, it wasn’t one of those vacations you look back on and wish you were still there. As I said before, traveling this year was a whole lot different than last year, and entertaining Eddie and Caitlyn proved to be troublesome. When we were out and doing things, it was great, but being in the car, or in the hotel, or even in a restaurant pretty much sucked. The kids were bored, we were frazzled, and everyone was exhausted.

We were on the road by 4:45 AM on Wednesday and we were both surprised at how easy and uneventful the drive actually was. We made it in to New Hampshire before 5:00 PM and we had stopped several times during the drive. We headed straight to dinner, swam in the hotel pool and were in bed fairly early.

I think we were all surprised to have slept in until almost 9:00 AM on Thursday. [ The hotel, by the way, was not nearly as fancy as their website made it seem. (This is where we stayed The marble finishing in the bathroom was silly; the extravagant bath products were the same that I actually own from Bath and Body Works, and the whole place smelled like bleach. (On our last night there the showerhead actually fell off while Ed was in the tub) It was a decent hotel, juts not what it was made out to be.] But anyway, we had breakfast at the buffet in the hotel and decided to drive up Mount Washington.

In the brochures, The Mount Washington Auto Road appears to be paved and safe, but in actuality, it’s a freaking death trap. The signs say it is wide enough for 2 cars to pass in opposite directions at any given time, but these must be compact Italian cars or something. There is no way that two SUV’s or minivans could have passed through at the same time. There are no guardrails; there is nothing other than your own seatbelt to keep you safe during your drive. So as extremely responsible parents, we drove right on up. The scenery, while beautiful, did not make up for how nervous I was the entire way up there. Caitlyn screamed until we were physically inside a cloud because it was so sunny out. And oh yeah, it was 32 degrees at the top of the mountain.

After driving down and grabbing a snack, we headed over to The Lost River Gorge and Boulder Caves, which is gorgeous and breathtaking…..and has about four million stairs. Ed had to carry Caitlyn through because she would have seriously held us up. Seriously. Eddie took a few photos while we were there:

And of course we captured some of the scenery and the kids.

We ate at The Muddy Moose that evening which is so incredibly cute, but unfortunately my scrod tasted like garbage. Or like garbage smells I guess. Then again, that’s probably what I get for eating something called “scrod”

We slept in again on Friday, and checked out of the hotel before we went on The Hobo Railroad. The kids loved the train ride, which came complete with a hobo lunch and bindle souvenir.

Afterwards we went to Clark’s Trading Post, which I just love, and shopped for a bit. We also bought fudge….Oreo fudge to be exact which we haven’t seen anywhere in years. We ate so much of it that it actually makes me nauseous to think about it now.

We headed in to Maine that evening and arrived around 6:00 or so. Maine for me was not anything spectacular, but maybe we just weren’t in the right area. We decided to keep the kids up late that night and grabbed a late dinner with Melissa and caught up for a while since we hadn’t seen her since I was 9 months pregnant with Cait. We made plans for the following day and called it a night.

After breakfast in the hotel on Saturday, we took a ride to see Lenny, the world largest chocolate moose, and then drove down to the ocean in the rain. We checked out a few shops and then went back to the hotel to get Melissa. It stopped raining, so we went to The Maine Wildlife Park, where I finally saw a live moose. Half joking, I asked Ed to climb the fence and take a picture for me so there wouldn’t be fence in the way, and he did it. The kids really enjoyed it, Eddie especially, but only because he thinks we peed in a garbage can. There was an outhouse in the middle of the park, and the toilet was actually a long metal cylinder with a seat on top of it, hence the garbage can confusion. If you ask Eddie what his favorite part of vacation was, he’ll tell you peeing in the garbage can.

That evening we dined at DiMillio’s Floating Restaurant, which was really good. It’s a huge old boat on the Portland waterfront and we ate while watching the sunset over the water. We drove around downtown a bit that evening as well. It was really nice to see a place with a developed waterfront that was booming.

Sunday, our last day there, we took a ride on The Maine Narrow Gauge Railroad, which was horrendously lame. We did get a few good shots of the ocean while we were there though, and cute photos of the kids as well. Afterward, we went to The Desert of Maine and then had lunch in Freeport. After a stop at Ben and Jerry’s and a great little store called Cool as a Moose, we were ready to head back.

We packed up that evening, and left for home at 4:00 AM on Monday, and actually made it home at about 2:30 in the afternoon.

It was a good vacation which left our bank account very much depleted, but in the end, we scored some pretty sweet shot glasses, took some great photos, and don’t forget, Eddie peed in a garbage can.

Haggard

2007-09-18T15:47:00.000-04:00

Traveling with a 2 and 3-year-old is a whole lot different than traveling with a baby and a 2-year-old. The pictures will tell you that we had a good time.

My face today would tell you otherwise because I am just BEAT!!

I will post this evening from home with pictures and all that jazz if I can keep my eyes open after work.

TTFN....

Five

2007-09-10T10:04:00.000-04:00

There is just so much that I want to say today....SO MUCH! But the fact that I have a million things to do before vacation is leaving me a bit stifled. So here is what I'd like to talk about, in list form, that I may expand on this evening after the children go to bed.

1. Friday is my 5-year anniversary. 5 years. I went in to my old blog to see what I might have written that may be nice to copy over here....but there was nothing usable. The whole thing basically read "me me me....blablabla....the photographer insulted my parents....the reception kicked ass....and apparently everything made us 'piss our pants' " I guess maturity at age 23 is not so much mature. I was looking for something with substance; something about how much I loved Ed and how happy I was to be his wife.....but there was nothing. I do love him though, and am so glad that we got married (and have now been together for 13 years) He is an amazing husband and father and tries so hard to make all of my dreams come true.

2. I become insane when vacation time rolls around. INSANE!!! Despite the ever-present state of disarray that my home is in, it must.be.spotless before we leave for 6 days. I can't have a mess hanging over us the whole time we're gone. (I get this from my mother) I also make list on top of list on top of list, and I check them and double check them and triple check them before we go. I'm a nut job. If only I could apply such drive to my every day life.

3. Daycare is really PISSING me right off....she has overcharged us every week since we moved over, to the point where with our vacation days we are paid up through the end of next week. When I checked with her this morning, after having spoken with her about vacation time daily for the last week or so, she scratched her head and said "are you sure you had the vacation time to use?" and she's lucky I didn't jump over the counter and strangle her. Seriously. I told her hat nothing can come out of our account on Friday.....no questions asked. And I will remind her again when I pick the kids up this afternoon. And I will probably send her an email tonight. And Wednesday morning before we leave.

4. I'd really like to have time to do TFM's Monday Mission today. It sounds very fun, and you know how I like to post pictures.

5. Ok, too much to do, I have to go!!!

Honesty

2007-09-08T21:29:00.000-04:00

I'm not going to write about my feelings as to whether or not I wshed I was pregnant....or how I feel about the whole thing. I'll tell you this honestly.....the list of pros and cons reads exactly the same. Pro---we would have 3 kids and be a fmaily of 5!! Con----we would have 3 kids and be a family of 5. I guess what that means is that I would love it if it happened, but I'm probably not looking to be knocked up again right now.

So since we are speaking honestly, tell me what you think of this headband I bought. I think I love it, but that it might not look good on me.

See how it has the tie thinger in the back? I might return it.

And since we're on the subject of me.....what do you think of my glasses which apparently are never going away as I rely on them more and more each day....

Sooooo.....

2007-09-07T10:17:00.000-04:00

I did buy a test, but never had a chance to take it. My period came yesterday....8 days late.

So here we are. :)

Just thougt I'd update that real quick, I am getting ready to go visit my friend Staci and hr new baby boy.

Update---but not really

2007-09-06T10:47:00.000-04:00

So, still no update from yesterday and I’m probably not going to waste any more money on tests since I’m going to the OBGYN on Tuesday. I’m just going to wait it out. (what this means is that I’ll probably break and buy 8 more tests on my lunch break today….) I’m uneasy because there were 2 negatives and one (sort of) positive. And to answer Swistle’s question, I took the test and waited for about a minute, got bored and left. After about 10/15 minutes I was back in the bathroom and there was the faint second line. All 3 tests came from the same box……maybe they were duds. I don’t know. Ed politely suggested this morning that I should perhaps drink some orange juice or pop a vitamin or something. I’m still waiting it out.

I took the kids to Target yesterday because Eddie outgrew his sneakers overnight, (and purposely didn’t buy any tests because how embarrassing would that be with 2 small children) and for the first time ever Caitlyn threw one holy hell of a temper tantrum. I’m talking red faced, screaming at the top of her lungs trying to tip the shopping cart over angry. I thought about this post. Wasn’t I so high and mighty? Talking it out always works for us, but my angels NEVER throw temper tantrums. BS. So how did I react you may ask? Bribery. Flat out bribery. Cait got a sweet pair of brown Mary Janes with gold bumblebee charms on them, a package of M&M’s and we stopped at McDonalds on the way home.

…….And I got a tub of ice cream for the inconvenience.

2007-09-05T13:16:00.000-04:00

So, you know that whole “I have my period and I’m miserable” post from last week? It was a false alarm. I spotted for 2 days and then it was gone. That’s actually kind of par for my cycle, spotting for a few days starting Wednesday, taking a few days off then coming back full force by Sunday. The only thing was that it didn’t come back on Sunday. And still has not come back as of today which is a full week from the spotting.

I’ve taken three pregnancy tests.

The first was negative.
The second had a faint second line.
The third was negative.

I don’t know what the hell is going on, but to say the least I’m still quite miserable. Some sort of delayed PMS perhaps? My boobs sure are killing me though. Regardless of what happens I have my annual with my OBGYN on Tuesday and I’m sure we’ll figure it all out then.

Autumn Change

2007-09-04T13:45:00.000-04:00

So let me ask you this? How is it September already? Where, oh where, did the summer go? I certainly have no idea. It seems like just a few days ago I was buying swimsuits and adorable tanks for the kids, and now I’m evaluating their autumn wardrobes to see what can be used and what needs to be bought.

I do love the change back to cooler weather though and not just because it is so beautiful, and the air is so crisp. Not just because the leaves will turn soon, and we’ll go out trolling through Letchworth Park, and picking pumpkins, and going through corn mazes or clearing the abundant heaps of chestnuts from our driveway and yard……or preparing for Halloween. I love all of those things, and autumn is truly my favorite season. When I close my eyes and think about it, I can actually smell the dried leaves and feel the change in the air.

The best thing of all though is fueling my addiction to cataloguing.

I love packing up the children’s clothes and filing them in labeled banker’s boxes. “Caitlyn-Summer 18-24mos” or “Eddie-Summer-4T (and some 3T)” and then packing them on the shelves in our basement. The clothes are categorized by size and gender from newborn on up. And once the old are packed away, I go to the gigantic green Rubbermaid tote, and pull out the new. These are clothes that the children got for Christmas or previous birthdays, that were a size or 2 too big (rather than exchanging them, I pack them away for the next year), or the hand-me-downs from Ed’s cousin and my boss. This year was the first time that I bought on clearance to fill their wardrobes for next year, so as I took the stored fall clothes out; I had new treasures, still with tags on, to add to my collection.

I don’t know why, but I feel such a sense of accomplishment in doing this all. For a brief moment it feels like we are starting fresh, a new season, a new outlook, and of course, new clothes.

Eddie and Caitlyn at Letchworth 2006

F R I D A Y

2007-08-31T15:40:00.000-04:00

I feel completely out of sorts, having been able to only visit blogs briefly over the last few days. My boss’ boss was in town Wednesday and Thursday, and with her being on disability, I had to entertain him. Fun times, let me tell you. I did get a trendy bank branded travel bag just in time for my much anticipated vacation and a $100 Visa Gift Card out of the deal, so I guess I can’t complain.

I’m also working tomorrow, which in case you are unaware, is Saturday. I don’t mind so much, because with the holiday, I still get Sunday and Monday off, and the comp day I get for tomorrow is extending my vacation by a day. It’s super slow on Saturdays anyway, so I plan to accomplish planning our vacation from start to finish before I leave here tomorrow.

Did I tell you I’m going on vacation? We leave 9/12. YAY! NH, I hear you calling!!

I have my period and I’m miserable. Not just the regular period stuff, but I find myself wanting another baby more and more. It seems to have gone in to overdrive since Cait turned 2. I don’t know what it is. We’re not trying or anything either, so it’s not even like there was a chance my period wouldn’t come. It’s still depressing though. Hormones are fun.

Does anyone out there have big plans for Labor Day? We have nothing. We’re looking for something to do on Sunday. Maybe. We might just want to stay home. We haven’t quite decided yet.

All right, I’m out of here. Must finish my work day.

I Wanna Dip My Balls In It

2007-08-30T20:52:00.000-04:00

If I do not get this for my birthday, I will be highly disappointed. I can not remember being more excited about anything for quite some time.

2007-08-29T15:22:00.001-04:00

I had to wear a trendy bank issued polo shirt to work today, along with a pair of khaki shorts. I wasn’t completely comfortable with the way I looked so I asked Ed for his opinion. Want to know what it was?

“You look like a gym teacher.”

He’s charming, huh?

Weekend Fun

2007-08-27T20:40:00.000-04:00

Ok, so did I scare anyone off with my enthusiasm for the sitemeter? I sure hope not. It's just so darn cool. I'm sure the novelty will wear off soon enough.

While the main reason I'm here is to tell you about Cait's party and post some oh so cute photos of the birthday girl, I'm obliged to first share a video from the Kenny Rogers concert. Unfortunately, it is sideways, but you wouldn't have been able to see him anyway. I guess it never occurred to me that you could not rotate a video in the same fashion as a photo. Anyhoo, heeeeeere's KENNY!

Isn't he dreamy? Even from there? (ok, so apparently, the video feature SUCKS!!)

Caitlyn had a great birthday party. My only regret is not taking a picture of the fruit salad I made. It was truly a work of art. It was beautiful day, and I'm pretty sure that everyone had a good time. The kids played on the playground and the boys played football. I got to see Marisa, George and Sophia. I thought that I had taken more pictures, but there's really just a few. In no particular order, here are photos of Cait in her birthday crown, courtesy of my brother Matt, photos of her dipping her finger in to the cake, and photos of her in her new pink cowgirl boots and cowgirl hat, along with her new fall jacket. Yes, she was a happy girl. Everything she got was "I wear!!" I can't wait until Christmas.

2007-08-27T10:06:00.001-04:00

Can I just tell you that I love my sitemeter? I LOVE it!! I love knowing who reads my blog and when, even if they don’t leave me a note. I feel all like “WOW!! People DO care what I have to say!!” What a great thing to install, and to think, I never even knew it was there! (or that people could see me lurking on their blogs like 5 times a day. Ha)

I will write and post pictures from Kenny Rogers and the birthday party this evening.

TTFN!

8 Random Thoughts

2007-08-24T11:44:00.001-04:00

1. I am test driving a new car on Monday and I am :SO: excited. Anything is better than the mommy-mobile minivan. And this is big enough to hold 3 car seats in the back seat, should the need arise. We can’t afford it, but I want it.

The Ford Edge

2. I am also 14 days away from my vacation and I am more than excited. Even if we weren’t going anywhere, I just need to get the heck out of work for a while.
3. Caitlyn’s birthday party is Sunday. So long as it doesn’t rain, it should be a blast. I ordered her a Diego cake, which I think she will LOVE. That and the sheer amount of food that will be there. She is a girl after my own heart.
4. She has been peeing on the potty at her new school. I’m so proud! We’ve also found a slew of kids who used to go to the old school and mysteriously disappeared---they have been at the new school all along. Just another step in us being comfortable there. And based on the declining enrollment at the old place, we are seeing familiar teachers at the new one too. It’s working out very well; the kids are doing great!
5. Ed is taking me to see Kenny Rogers tonight. I CAN NOT wait. I bawled when he took me to see The Monkees and I fear I will do the same when Kenny takes the stage. I love him. (and I totally know what a freak I am, and I’m so OK with it.)
6. I had jury duty this week and my number never came up, thank goodness! Though it would have been nice to get out of work.
7. MySpace is like a freaking high school reunion. I can’t believe how many people keep showing up there. It’s just like old times!
8. I have the cold from hell. It’s just congestion and a scratch throat that is impossible to treat. Better now than while on vacation though.

Top 10 Hysterical (and sometimes inappropriate) Things Heard From My Kids Lately

2007-08-23T14:28:00.000-04:00

10. Eddie “I’m a piss-pot!!! Right Mommy?” and when he’s told not to talk like that.. “But I WANT to be a piss-pot!”
9. Eddie ”Mommy why does Cait pee out her butt?”
8. Caitlyn, when asked her name “Caitlyn Mason Lastname, JR.” We tell her that her name is Caitlyn Renee, and she replies “NO I JUNIOR!!!” (she also pronounces Caitlyn Cake-Inn which is adorable.)
7. Eddie: “Do you love me, yes or no?” even though he says it 100 times a day
6. Caitlyn upon hearing someone else wished a happy birthday “NO! It my HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!”
5. And also “ I two!” and she holds up 2 tiny fingers.
4. Caitlyn every time I leave the room “Don’t leeeeeeeeeeave me Mommy!!!”
3. Eddie “Pssssssss” as he grabs his crotch and pretends to pee everywhere
2. Eddie “This is my FAVORITE toy!!” as he stis down in front of the mirror at the play vanity in his new classroom.
1. Caitlyn, while lifting up her shirt and pressing on her nipples “I got 2 buttons, Mommy!! Just like you!!!!!!”

I love them muchly.

A Few Photos From This Weekend

2007-08-22T14:18:00.000-04:00

I'm going to try and keep it short but these are too cute not to share. :)

First, from our baseball game on Friday night--

(do you like my legs?)

Then a few from Cait's little party at home and her new birthday tricycle--yeah, she's a bruiser :) Notice her trendy tattoo. :)

The rest are from the fair and the demo derby. Take note of Dead Mickey Mouse

And probably my favorite one of all--Eddie watching the derby

Recoup

2007-08-21T11:31:00.001-04:00

This past weekend took a lot out of all of us.

Friday night we went to the baseball game down town and stayed for the fireworks afterward. The kids had a really good time, but we didn’t get home until after 11PM.

Saturday, we had cake for Cait’s birthday in the afternoon and then later went to the county fair and saw the school bus demolition derby with my MIL. The kids loved it! A few of the busses were painted really well and we rooted for the Spiderman Bus all night long. Our second favorite was the Mickey Mouse Bus that had a Mickey Mouse figure standing on top of it. Unfortunately, after a few hits Mickey fell down which upset Caitlyn quite a bit. Then his head fell off and another bus ran it over which caused her to go in to a fit of hysterics. Ed and I were trying to calm her down telling her it wasn’t the real Mickey and so on when Eddie screams “MICKEY IS DEAD CAIT!!!” and kind of rolled his eyes like “deal with it already”. We couldn’t help but laugh. We aren’t winning any awards for parents of the year, that’s for sure.

We took a lot of photos but I haven’t had the chance to download them yet. We spent the day doing pretty much nothing Sunday and everyone was pretty crabby from lack of sleep.

Yesterday was day one at the new daycare and drop off went well; we spent some time with each of the kids in their new room and they were good. Today, not so much. Eddie was fine, but Caitlyn freaked out. Ed wanted to stay with her until she was calm and I wanted to leave and let her work it out. He stayed, arguing that it was like we were leaving her with strangers, and I left. I see his point and where he is coming from; I do. But I feel like if we baby her she will refuse to get used to it. I know that I’m doing the right thing, but I feel horrible when I leave her.

They really do enjoy the new place so far though. Eddie has a guinea pig named Max in his room and he can bring him home for a weekend if he wants.
(God, please don’t let him want to bring the guinea pig home.) He also enjoyed the hermit crabs in another room. Cait had fun riding tricycles and playing with a little girl named Anna.

I’m still tired from the weekend and from having Eddie in our bed last night, and on top of it, I’m strangely nauseous. I’d really just like to go home to bed, but I have too much to do at work.

Maybe we could start today over……

To My Sweet Baby Girl

2007-08-17T11:20:00.000-04:00

Dear Caitlyn,

Tomorrow is Saturday and you will be two years old. I don’t know where the time has gone because I swear that just yesterday you were your tiny baby self content to lie in my arms or be carried in your sling all day long.

You have accomplished a lot since your first birthday. Learning to walk was especially great and running and jumping came soon after. You knew many words on your first birthday and you gradually began stringing them together this year, and now, you speak full clear sentences and enjoy conversation with all of us. You’ve always been able to communicate your needs, wants, pleasure and displeasure, but to hear you put it in to words is absolutely amazing.

You still love to eat, and will try anything once. Your personal policy when it comes to food is “what’s on your plate is mine” and you help yourself accordingly. You are the best eating child I know.

For a 2-year-old, you are still quite small, but what you lack in size you make up for with personality. You are tiny, but tenacious, and quite honestly, you are something else. Everything is 100% with you; there are no in betweens. And for as frustrating as it can be sometimes, I hope you never lose this quality. Being headstrong as you are (just like your daddy) will take you places in life.

And though you are 2 now and not quite a baby anymore, you have the sweetest baby face I’ve ever seen. I could stare at your adorable nose and those big, beautiful hazel eyes all day long, kiss your chubby cheeks a million times and never be tired.

Happy birthday baby girl. I love you more than you know.

Love,

Mama

Child Care Concerns

2007-08-13T11:49:00.001-04:00

We found out last week that our daycare center is closing as of December 31st. Our center is a smaller offshoot of a local chain and they can not offer what their newer centers do. (The chain has been opening “state of the art” centers all over our area, so the real reason ours is closing is $$.) The kids were guaranteed a spot at their “BRAND NEW STATE OF THE ART CENTER” which opens in January and is where the entire staff is transferring to, but unfortunately, it is nowhere near our house or where I work and therefore is not an option.

This was extremely upsetting for me being that the kids have gone there since they were each 8 weeks old and Ed and I are both extremely comfortable with the staff and the care that they receive there. I don’t want to rehash everything I’ve been through since Thursday, but our saga has gone from changing centers in January, to changing in September, to what is actually happening which is changing centers on Monday, 8/20. This was the only way to guarantee a position at their other location that is just as close to our house. In other words, they won’t hold an open spot until January.

That being said, the kids move over next week and I am stuck filling out paperwork on their personalities as they have likely changed since the last time I filled the packets out when they were babies. They ask inane questions such as “what upsets your child?” and I’m tempted to answer “changing centers!” but I’m giving helpful answers instead. Have you ever tried putting your 2-year-old’s personality in to words? On paper? It’s not the easiest thing to do.

In any case, we toured the new center with the kids on Friday. Ed and I had been there before because this is originally where we wanted Eddie to go when he was a baby, but they were full-this is how we ended up at the smaller center. Both children were excited about the indoor playground and the huge playground and garden out back. They also get to choose between taking dance or tae kwon do as enrichment activities. Eddie was amazed by their computer room as well. He actually wanted to start going there today. As a bonus, he will be placed in the same room as his cousin Kayla, so there will be a familiar face, and we’re hoping that his best friend Emma will be there soon too. I’m worried about Caitlyn though, who has a hard time at drop off anyway. We haven’t heard yet that any of her friends are transferring. Next Monday is going to be a hard day all around.

The new center also comes at an increased cost, but starting in September, the kids will be home with Ed 2 days a week, so we will actually be saving money, just less than we would have if they were not moving.

It truly is a better equipped center and as far as programs go, the kids will be better off there. It is bittersweet though, leaving behind the teachers and aides who have been so good to them, and have loved them so much as well as the friends they have.

Kids are resilient. I just wish that I was.

Temper Tantrum Tactics

2007-08-08T15:38:00.000-04:00

I have to say that I was more than a little bit irritated while listening to the local radio station on my way in to work this morning. I was actually kind of, well, furious. I tuned in and they were taking tips from moms on how to stop a temper tantrum, or how they react to a kid’s temper tantrum. Here are a few of the suggestions:

• Tell them Santa is watching and if they keep it up, there will be no presents.
• Pick them up and hold them tight giving them tons of kisses and hugs
• If the tantrum is about wanting something in the store, offer them something else to quiet them down. That way, they’re not winning, but they’re still happy and quiet.
• If in public, walk away so that you’re out of sight and make your child think you left them there. Scare the tantrum right out of them.

And my personal favorite, and the only point where the radio personality cut the caller off:

• If it’s a bad tantrum, where they begin to hyperventilate, jam your knuckles in to the child’s chest to “shock them out of it”, or pinch them with your fingernail, or splash water in their face.

I’m not intending to pass judgment here, although, ultimately it will come off sounding like I am. I realize that different things work for different children and that everyone has a different parenting style, and that this was a random sampling of parents in my area, but I can’t see how any of these are good ideas. You child knows you are full of crap when you pull the Santa card. Believe me. My own mother would pull that crap out in July. Your kid knows they’re getting presents regardless. Picking them up and hugging and kissing the tantrum right out of them….what? Giving the child something else but not what they want so “you are the winner” does not seem like the way to go either. Somehow I don’t think it’s about winning. And as far as I’m concerned, shocking or scaring a child out of a tantrum is abuse.

Here is my personal policy on tantrums- they are not allowed. That is not to say that my kids don’t throw tantrums, because on occasion, they do. We all have our moments, right? When a tantrum does come on, Ed and I are consistent in our approach. If we are at home, the child is welcome to cry and carry on, so long as they do it in the privacy of their bedroom. Once they have pulled themselves together, we will discuss what has occurred and what the resolution should be. If we are in public, whether it’s a store, church or party, the child is removed from the situation. No questions asked, and again, we discuss it once they have calmed down. We also set the expectation of what is going to occur before going someplace, i.e. “We are going to Target to buy a gift for your cousin. That is all we are buying today.” Giving it to them straight, up front, goes a long way with my kids.

Again, I’m lucky in that my kids aren’t tantrum throwers. Perhaps I’d have a different perspective if they were, or if I’d experienced some of the extreme behavior others talk about. The reality is that they’re a product of their environment and I’m a strong believer in the fact that my kids behave the way that they do because of the way we interact with them. This may not be the case for other people, I don't know. I'm definitely not judging the parents of kids who do act out because like I said, all kids are different.(Unless you're letting them scream in church and not taking them out. Then I am judging you.) I do know some great parents whose kids have horrendous tantrums.

What does everyone else out there think? How do you deter the temper tantrum?

Regarding Baby Clothes

2007-08-07T12:46:00.000-04:00

This started out as a comment on Swistle's Blog, right here, but it got too long. I love talking about baby clothes though, so here it goes.

Oh boy! Baby clothes is one of my favorite subjects! When Eddie was born in the dead of winter, I had no problem just keeping him in the footed sleepers at home. He stayed warm, and I was sure he was warm. When he started daycare I sent him in a new outfit every day. Sometimes he’d go through 3 outfits a day, but he was always fully clothed.

When Cait was born in the dead heat of summer, I kept her in onsies, but I bought the ones with the little skirt around them so she was a bit dressed up. I had the same policy on her leaving the house though, always dressed.

I openly admit that I am neurotic about my children’s appearance and clothing and I know that this is a direct result of not having a lot of clothes, especially the “cool clothes” while I was growing up. I don’t ever want my kids to feel like I did. EVER. So even though it makes no difference to them right now, it makes a huge difference to me.

We tend to get lucky in the hand me down department as both kids have cousins, a brother/sister pair who are about a year older than them, whose grandma shops at high end stores. They get a lot of high quality never worn stuff as well as winter coats and snow pants—a tremendous help. When it comes to buying clothes, I do a lot of Old Navy and Target clearance, plus the Okee Dokee branch at JC Penny and Sears has a play clothes line that is extremely reasonable $5-$6 per piece, pants and shirts. They usually run a 2 for $9 special at season change and that’s where I get a lot. They get plenty of clothes for gifts as well.

Oh, Swistle, by the way—I am the same way with girly clothes, even if I end up having another girl. Cait has way more than she will ever need or wear and I just.can’t.stop.buying…..

And when they’re done with the clothes, they are stored in labeled bankers boxes categorized by gender and size and stored in age order in my basement so that I’ll know right where they are when the time comes.

Neurotic much?

Caitlyn's Birth Story

2007-08-06T12:58:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, I don’t have an entire back story about Caitlyn’s conception. Ed and I were not being particularly careful and my cycles were completely erratic. I took at least one pregnancy test a month because after ceasing nursing at 7 months (along with coping with the demands of an infant) I had no idea where I was in my cycle at any given time.

I remember, right after Thanksgiving, telling Ed “I’m sure I’m done ovulating by now…”

Yeah.

There was a work Christmas party on 12/16/04 and I planned on drinking for maybe the 3rd time since I had Eddie. When I woke up that morning I had it in my head to take a pregnancy test before I went to dinner or else I would never forgive myself. For peace of mind, you know. I did not even consider for a second that it would be positive.

SURPRISE!!

I had never experienced a positive home pregnancy test since I found out about Eddie in the doctor’s office. I peed on the stick and continued on with my business. It blared a positive result after about 3 seconds. I, of course, went in to panic mode. I had an 11-month-old. And I was pregnant, again. I was just starting to look normal again. And oh.my.god. What was Ed going to say? I woke him up at 6:00am. He’d had no idea I’d even taken the test. I told him, we talked about it a bit, and decided that we were totally fine with it.

We told our families early this time, over Christmas, with Eddie wearing an “I’m the Big Brother T-shirt” on Christmas Eve. We wrapped it up for my mom to help Eddie open on Christmas Day. People were surprised, for sure. But we all knew that Caitlyn was meant to be. My due date was 8/26/05.

Early on in the pregnancy, I contracted a horrible kidney infection and was hospitalized for 2 days. I continued to have urinary tract infections through the pregnancy, but that was my only complaint. In comparison to my first pregnancy, this one was cake! As much as I hated pregnancy the first time around, I just loved it this time. I was never sick. I was no more tired than I had been while caring for Eddie. I felt great!

The cravings were a lot different the second time as well. I still drank my coffee, 1 cup of regular in the morning and a cup of half-caf in the afternoon. I loved on strawberries and whipped cream. I needed to have Cedar Point Corn Dogs and Ed wouldn’t go get them for me. Instead, I wrapped hotdogs in crescent rolls and ate them for lunch and dinner for at least 2 weeks. I went to Starbucks almost daily for the strawberries and crème frappucino with a shot of vanilla.

I knew from the beginning that this was a girl, and we had it confirmed with our 20 week ultrasound. We knew her name already, and until about 3 weeks before she was born it was going to be spelled Catelyn. I changed it to Caitlyn and then we moved on to the middle name, (which to this day, Ed is not a fan of.) Her name would be Caitlyn Renee.

We traveled to Virginia Beach and Richmond when I was 8 months pregnant and it was probably the most miserable car ride of my life. We walked everywhere though and had a really good time. Here is a photo of me 8 months pregnant feeding a giraffe. If you recall the photos from my 1st pregnancy, you can see that I carried her a whole lot differently. She was up high and under my ribs for the entire pregnancy.

I worked up until the beginning of August. The summer averaged about 90 degrees every day and I could hardly walk because my ankles were so swollen. I saw the one doctor at my practice that I hated, and she pulled me, so she was my new best friend. I wanted to nest, I really did, but I could barely move. I had until the end of the month, right? The good news was that we had never put the bassinette away after we moved Eddie to the crib. All I had to do was put the linens back in. I did manage to get her clothes washed and put away in all of their pink and frilly over-abundance.

On August 16th, we went to our county fair. I was having tons of contractions as we walked around in the 95 degree heat. Figuring I was dehydrated, I drank 3 bottles of water. Everything settled down by the time we got home. I went to the doctor in the morning and saw my very favorite midwife, the one who assisted in delivering Eddie. I told her about everything that was going on and she checked me out. I was 2 cm but very thinned out so she stripped my membranes with her finger. (This apparently separates membranes from the cervix.......I can still feel it when I think about it. Not cool.) She was sure I would go in to labor that night.

I was nervous because Ed was working out of town that day, but the contractions held off. I honestly had my first one as he walked in the door at 7pm. They were sporadic all night and I went to sleep in the recliner wondering if I actually was in labor. I woke around 2am definitely in labor. I had the classic feeling of “maybe if I just poop I’ll feel better.” I didn’t. I woke Ed up and told him we had to go. Then I proceeded to do 150 other things to make sure Eddie was taken care of. I called the midwife (the nasty one was on call) myself and she told me that if I was talking to her, there was no way I was in hard labor, but that she would meet me at the hospital anyway.

Ed took this picture right before we left. He’s charming, isn’t he? (to be uploaded later because i don't have it at work--it's a miserable picture)

My water broke in the driveway at 3:45 AM. We were at the hospital by 4 and I was in excruciating pain. It took them forever to get the IV started and me hooked up to everything, so I had to wait for the epidural. The anesthesiologist was in around 5:15am to do the epidural asking me all kinds of questions. The midwife was still not there. He finally started threading it through and gave me the initial shot. I started pushing (involuntarily) just was the midwife walked in. The anesthesiologist never even started the drip because Caitlyn was coming. Ed ran back in the room just as they flipped me over to get going. 3 pushes and she was out. (Don’t worry, the epidural kicked in just in time for my 3 stitches)

Caitlyn Renee was born at 5:37am on August 18, 2005. She weighed 9lbs 5oz and was 21 inches long. As with her brother, the NICU was paged because of her size. She was also hypoglycemic, but the doctor also felt an abnormal bulge in her belly. She was taken away before I could nurse her, and just after I held her for a minute.

They were afraid that the bulge was an intestinal problem, and didn’t want her to eat anything, so they started an IV to get her blood sugar up. We were relieved to hear that there was absolutely nothing wrong with her after a few hours, but disappointed to hear that because an IV was started, they would have to wean her off of it. Unlike an adult, a baby couldn’t handle the IV just being taken out and it had to be reduced gradually.

And so began the long ordeal of Caitlyn in the NICU. I could go up there to nurse her, but they were giving her formula to keep her sugar up. Every time they reduced the IV, her levels dropped just enough to be considered “unstable”. Day one turned in to day two and she was still on the IV.

All of my hopes and dreams were shattered in this horrendous post partum state. She was supposed to be in the room with me, and Eddie was supposed to come bounding in, wearing his big brother t-shirt, and climb up in my bed and hold his baby sister for the first time. Everyone was supposed to be there to fawn over my baby girl. Instead, Eddie came for about 30 minutes and played cars with me on the floor in my hospital room. Outside of Ed’s Mom, his Aunt Gail and Uncle Rich, and Marisa and George, nobody came to see me. Why would they if they couldn’t see the baby, right? I gave up at that point. I didn’t go up and nurse her regularly. I stayed in my room, slept and watched TV, checking on her sporadically. Ed and I fought because I wasn’t doing enough. I just couldn’t do it, physically or mentally.

Day 3 arrived and they had no idea if she would be released along with me. Her final reading was scheduled for 10pm. I decided that sitting around the hospital hoping she could come home wouldn’t do anyone any good, so I went home. I pumped. I spent time with Eddie. And then Ed and I went to his 10 year high school reunion for a bit and waited for a call.

The hospital did call just after 10 to say that we could come and get her. Her reading was still low, but nothing that I couldn’t handle, they said. So off we went. I still hadn’t put the bassinette linens on and the car seat straps needed to be adjusted from the last time Eddie used it. I went to the NICU for the final time and put her in her going home outfit, even though it was after 11 by the time we got there, and we took our baby girl home.

Fortunately, this was where any feelings of depression subsided.

Caitlyn was a great baby, came home sleeping 4 hours at a pop. She fit right in. Eddie wasn’t thrilled with her at first, as she took up a lot of my time, but he quickly became a good big brother. We got in to a routine right away because Ed worked a lot. I kept her in the front carrier quite a bit so that my hands were free to tend to Eddie and housework. She came to the park with us, on the car ride while I took Eddie to school. I think the most important part of integrating her in to the family was keeping everything very much the same. She did what we always did.

Our family was, and is, perfect.

****On a side note, I know this is really long…I know****

I spoke briefly about this in my 100 facts list. When Caitlyn was about a month old, she spiked a really high fever and was hospitalized with suspected meningitis. A ton of tests determined that it was just a viral infection; however, they kept her hospitalized because a baby that young should not have a fever. I spent three days in the hospital with her, nursing her, hanging out and taking care of her. At that point, I felt like we finally bonded. Ed said it to me then, and I truly believe that this was sent from God. No, it is never fun to have your child hospitalized and it was certainly stressful. But I spent the time with her, just me, alone, that I should have to begin with. And somehow, I finally felt complete. He does work in mysterious ways.

Alumni Newsletter

2007-08-03T12:07:00.000-04:00

I got this over at Swistle's, and it seems to be turning in to a meme, so of course, I couldn't resist!

First write a nauseatingly perky paragraph about your life, the type of paragraph you see in alumni newsletters. Then write a franker, funnier one.

Here goes:

Sara and Ed have been married since 2002 and have 2 beautiful children, Eddie who is 3 and Caitlyn who is 2. Sara works a fulfilling full time job while Ed runs a carpet cleaning business from home. They enjoy spending time together as a family and finding fun family oriented activities to do together on the weekends.

Although Sara and Ed have been married since 2002, they had been together for 13 years. They’re starting to grate on each other’s nerves. Add two toddlers to the mix and it’s a freaking party!! Sara is so frazzled that she spent 5 minutes at the medicine cabinet this morning just trying to decide which toothbrush was hers. Our house is madness, and by the way, it’s falling apart. If you ever cared for me, please come help us! Take the kids to the park or grab a mop!

If you are reading this, consider yourself tagged.

And Now the Rest of the Story-Eddie's Birth

2007-07-31T09:33:00.000-04:00

It was January 6th, 2004 and I was officially 2 days overdue. Other than having spent our entire dinner at Applebee’s the night before in the bathroom, I was feeling pretty good. I had a routine doctor’s appointment to discuss exactly how long they were going to let me be overdue before they induced. My appointment was around 11am so Ed and I had a quick breakfast at home and headed over there.

At my OBGYN office, anytime you are seeing the doctor over the midwife, there is a wait. We waited nearly two hours before we saw her. She asked a lot of questions about how I was feeling before she even checked me. When she did check me, she looked up in amazement and asked if I was sure that I wasn’t having contractions. I told her that I didn’t think so, and she said “well you’re 5cm!!” She decided to do an ultrasound to see what was going on with the baby, and again there was a wild and surprised look on her face.

“This baby is at least 9 lbs.”, she said. “You need to go to the hospital!!”

She then gave me a 15 minute lecture about how my worst fear might come true; I may have to have a c-section. I felt all of the color drain from my face and I felt like I was going to throw up. When you’ve been told since you were 15 years old that you have “the perfect hips for birthing”, the thought of a C-section never comes in to play. For my entire pregnancy, I never even considered that I would have a c-section. Much like the day that I was told I was going to have a baby, I was in shock. I walked out of the doctor’s office barely hearing her call after me “Make sure you don’t eat anything in case we do the c- section! Have them call me when you get to the hospital!”

As soon as we got in the car, I lost it. I sobbed hysterically. I couldn’t breath. I made Ed call Marisa at work to tell her everything, and then I got on the phone and blubbered to her. I know that I called my parents, but I can’t remember speaking to either of them. I was sure that I was having a nervous breakdown. I had just about calmed down when we got home, but as soon as we got in the house and started getting my stuff together, I was hysterical again. I went in the bathroom to compose myself, and Ed took this wonderful picture of me:

We left the house around 3:00PM and had to run a few errands, stop at the bank, etc. It was going on 6 hours since I had eaten and Ed was hungry too. He grabbed some food and we were at the hospital by about 5:30 PM.

As soon as we were checking in, they got me hooked up to the pitocin, which immediately gave me intense contractions. It was about 2 hours before I was in tears and needed the epidural, the greatest invention I know of. Marisa and George, my parents and Ed’s mother were in and out of the room. Marisa had to work the next day, so when things weren’t happening, they left around 10PM. Very soon after that it was time to push. I can’t remember anything that happened during the pushing phase other than telling Ed that if he put one more FUCKING ice chip in my mouth, I would strangle him. I pushed until about midnight before I overheard the doctor saying she wouldn’t let me push much longer. I had a renewed strength at that point because there was no way I was going through all of this crap just to be cut open, and started pushing like a crazy person after that. The problem: Eddie was posterior or sunny side up. After another 2 hours, his head was nearly out but we needed some help. (Apparently, all of the tearing didn’t help at all) Ed describes my episiotomy with great detail. “They both had a pair of scissors in each hand! They snipped you everywhere!” They ended up using the vacuum and finally, after 4 hours of pushing, I had my baby boy!

Edmund Mason, Jr. was born at 2:13 AM January 7, 2004. He weighed 10lbs 2oz and was 23 inches long. We couldn’t believe how much he looked exactly like his daddy.

I had never been happier. Ed held him while I was being stitched up and then the neonatal doctor took him to be checked out because of his size. His blood sugar was a bit low, so they took him upstairs and gave him some sugar water in a bottle. By the time I was in my room and slept for about 30 minutes, he was ok, and ready to nurse.

Now everything that I ever read said that babies are not hungry at birth; it takes them a few days to have that kick in. Eddie was ravenous when he was born. He nursed every 2 hours like clockwork the entire time we were in the hospital. So I would nurse for an hour, sleep for an hour nurse again…and so on. I couldn’t believe what I had signed on for.

Our second night in the hospital was the worst. First of all, I was more sore, and sore in the oddest places, than I had ever been in my entire life. Then I was more exhausted than I had ever been, and in the middle of the night, my 1-day-old baby forgot how to nurse. I couldn’t get him to latch on, he was screaming, and I was crying hysterically. I called the nursery and sobbed/screamed in to the phone that someone needed to come and help me. I think they thought I hurt the baby because they were down there so fast. And there I was, half naked on the bed, trying to get him to take a boob, just defeated. And you know what? The nurses acted like I was normal; like it was no big deal. They brought in some sugar water and helped me get him going. The whole nursing thing went reasonable well after that.

I loved staying in the hospital. We had tons of visitors, and Eddie was a hit. I had my fill of hospital food (which I love because I’m a F R E A K) and also my gourmet dinner. The nurses in the nursery loved him, and my favorite one, an older Indian woman, showed him off to all of the girl babies and thought about which one would be his girlfriend. (She kissed him on the head on her last shift before we left and whispered “I will see you back in a year or so with a baby sister” which is just way too weird) Nurses and doctors from all over the hospital came to meet me because I was the girl that pushed out the 10 lb posterior baby. In fact, on our way out to go home, our delivery room nurse introduced me to the patient she was walking out as “the girl I told you about, with the 10 lb baby.”

And home we went to start our life as a family. Having a baby was the best thing I ever did, and I had never felt more fulfilled as a person than when I became a mother. All of the misery of pregnancy and the horrendous delivery were worth it; worth it enough to do it again……and maybe even again some day.

Eddie's Birth Story- My Pregnancy

2007-07-30T16:46:00.000-04:00

My pregnancy, at the beginning anyway, was horrendous.

First there was the constant nausea. I never once threw up, I just always felt like I was going to. I kept food on my night stand and just did the best I could. I couldn’t stand to drink or smell coffee which was a feeling so foreign that I can’t even describe it.

After the nausea came the bleeding. Incessant bleeding. Nothing was ever wrong, it just turned out that I had “a very vascular cervix” but to be safe, relations were suspended by my doctor until after the 1st trimester.

And after those two things came the worry; the ever-present worry. I had read so much about things going wrong for someone with my particular thyroid condition. I was so nervous about losing the baby, so nervous that it would be gone forever, I just counted the days until my 1st trimester was over.

The most defining moment in my pregnancy was having a cautious ultra-sound when I was 7 weeks along, during the bleeding. There was the baby, a teeny tiny bean in there with a heartbeat. A HEARTBEAT!! When I was 7 weeks…which is really only 3 weeks after my missed period-I was in complete wonder at the evidence of life in me so early on. 7 weeks.

When the 2nd trimester began, so did the cravings. I did not crave a single thing that was good for me. I was on a Twinkie binge for nearly a month (to the point where my boss was smuggling in Twinkies to work because Ed forbade me to eat them), and with the exception of having to have orange juice with my breakfast, I drank root beer, Mug Root Beer to be exact, morning, noon and night. I could not eat tomatoes in any form and thinking about baked macaroni and cheese with breadcrumbs on it made me sick. I craved favorite foods from my childhood: creamed cucumbers, peanut butter cookies, and my aunt’s deviled potato salad. Later on, it was breaded pork chops. We ate them for a week straight before Ed said anything.

I was huge and in full maternity clothes by the time I was 4 months pregnant.

At my 20 week appointment I was ecstatic to find out that we were having a boy. I sobbed in the ultrasound room and Ed was sure it was because I wanted to have a girl, but really, it just made it so much more real. A boy, and he would be Edmund Mason Jr.

Of course, we registered immediately and my mother and aunt began planning my baby shower. I had never been so excited in my life. All the clothes and toys and blankets. Who knew that there was even so much out there for babies? I felt like an idiot, let me tell you.

Here is me at 7 months:

And here is me at my baby shower, with my mother.

I had planned on working right up until my due date because I had just been promoted, but just before Thanksgiving I started having contractions. Ed and I went to the hospital, and I was in labor, 6 weeks early. I was re-hydrated and given something to stop the contractions and sent home. I worked for just about another week before I was pulled indefinitely. This was actually pretty cool because I got Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years off. I felt fine, other than the heartburn that had me sleeping upright in our recliner, and we took the time to put things together and set up Eddie’s room.

Christmas came and everyone marveled at my huge belly and we all laughed at how I balanced my dinner plate and pop can on it for the duration of our meal.

It was perfectly relaxing, and a wonderful experience to have no obligations, and just be able to enjoy the last weeks of my pregnancy at home, just getting ready for this life changing event.

Preface to Eddie's Birth

2007-07-30T11:58:00.000-04:00

I was 24 years old, and for at least 3 years I had wanted to have a baby. When Ed and I were married in September 2002 the instinct went in to overdrive. It was all I talked about, every single day. I had stopped taking the pill the day after our wedding, and had become proficient in tracking my cycle. Ed was uncomfortable with the thought of a baby, and barely even entertained the subject.

Ed and I arrived home around the same time one day in April 2003…ok, it was April 16th to be exact. He told me that he had been giving it a lot of thought and that he wanted to have a baby with me. I’m not going to give you the gory details; we all know how babies are made. I knew I was ovulating at the time and I called Ed on it. (It was very weird for me, because we had been “doing it” while I was ovulating for 6 months and I was always nervous that I’d be pregnant and he’d be disappointed. In a crazy kind of way, I feel like since Ed finally wanted it, that I allowed myself to get pregnant that night.)

After a few weeks, I started having horrendous cramps that Midol wouldn’t even touch. I was sure that I was getting my period. I went to my primary doctor for a check-up and mentioned to the nurse practitioner that I was one day late for my period. She asked if I was usually regular, and I was extremely regular at the time. She thought that it wouldn’t hurt to do a pregnancy test, so I did. She told me I’d have to wait about 10 minutes for the results, but burst in to the examining room after about 3 minutes and congratulated me on being pregnant. (It turned out that the cramping was implantation)

I was in shock. I don’t think I even moved when she told me. I didn’t laugh or cry. I stood up, my legs like jelly, and walked out to my car in a complete daze. All I could think about was how I would ever make it back to work and function for the rest of the day; how would I tell Ed without anyone hearing me? For whatever reason, I didn’t have my cell phone that day, so I stopped and tried to call him from a payphone. No answer. I tried again and still no answer. I drove reluctantly back to work.

I eventually reached him from work and told him the news in whispers. He was hard to read. (I later found out that he thought I said the dr. said I might be pregnant) He had a lot of questions that I really couldn’t answer because my job at the bank at that time had me in an environment where I was surrounded by people. I didn’t go right home from work that night as I was taking classes. I bombed an important math test and was finally home about 9:00 PM.

When Ed fully understood, he was thrilled. We talked for a long time, both of us scared, and excited.

We were going to be parents.

2007-07-27T11:04:00.001-04:00

I’ve been reading a lot of birth stories lately, and I’ve been wanting to document mine for quite some time, you know, before they’re too far gone from my memory, so that is my next project. I’m going to start with my darling Eddie and Do Caitlyn in the next few weeks as we approach her (gulp) second birthday.

A Photo Entry

2007-07-26T11:33:00.000-04:00

Here's what happens when you let your almost-2-year-old have access to your cupboards:

Potatoes in your bed

These are the glorious cookies I made using Sarah's recipe:

This is the cutest girl in the world...

One of my new favorite photos, Eddie and Grandpa at the creek

Paris Hilton in training:

Caitlyn the monkey at the brown park:

Eddie on the ladder:

And going down the HUUUUGE twisty slide at the brown park for the 1st time

One more at the creek:

And finally, the giant coffee mug Ed bought me at Cedar Point next to my regular favorite mug for emphasis:

K E T C H U P

2007-07-23T16:52:00.000-04:00

I remember singing a song in grade school, something along the lines of

“Ketchup is good on most anything! Hot Dogs! Hamburger! Onion Rings!”

I thought about it the other day as I made some wonderfully tender, flavorful breaded turkey cutlets for dinner. They were quite amazing, if I do say so myself. Naturally, I took offense when Ed put ketchup on them. KETCHUP! ON TURKEY!

He said to me at one point during dinner

“The ketchup tastes kind of weird….”

I didn’t even look up from my plate, but replied quite snarkily

“Perhaps it’s because you’re dipping TURKEY in it.”

I was livid, and so offended, and so……like my mother……in that moment.

But seriously, what in the hell would possess you to slather ketchup all over your perfectly good dinner? To be honest with you, I find it to be quite rude.

I blame his mother, who coats my perfect pork chops in the stuff. I know, right!! MY PORK CHOPS! They taste like heaven!

His mother who upon dishing herself a plate of my cheesy Italian goulash this past Saturday, immediately went to the fridge and squeezed ketchup all over it.

I threw her out of my house.

OK, not really, but I sure felt like it.

And what happened when I politely informed her that there was already ketchup in the goulash?

She giggled and took her seat.

Another Non-Post

2007-07-19T16:38:00.001-04:00

1. It is 49 days until I am on vacation, and 52 days until I will be in The White Mountains of New Hampshire in a VERY well appointed hotel room for very little money ($89/night) due to it being EXACTLY one week before their peak fall foliage season begins.

2. And in 55 days we will be in Portland, Maine where I will consume lobster for breakfast, lunch, dinner and dessert (where available). We will spend time in another beautiful hotel for $55 a night because our good friend Melissa is the General Manger there….ooooh yeah.

3. My 5 year wedding anniversary is also in 55 days. Do you think that vacation is enough of a gift to each other? Or should I be considering a gift for Ed?

4. It’s going to be a beautiful, sunny weekend. We’re looking for something fun to do on Saturday. I’d like to go to the Toronto Zoo, but I don’t know if we feel like driving 1.5 hours. Ed has to work on Sunday, but the kids and I are going to Canal Fest (celebrate the Erie Canal!! WOOT!! WOOT!!) with my parents. [there’s actually a really cool craft show and festival]

5. Ed spent the day with my brother and some friends at Cedar Point yesterday. He was the only husband to bring a gift back for his wife (a huuuuuge coffee mug) . He also called me from the spot where he proposed and told me how much he missed me, and that it wasn’t the same without me. Brownie points for him.

6. He bought the kids hats too.

7. This girl at work constantly starts her sentences with “As well”. For example, “As well, we will be moving to a new format next week.” She drives me insane

8. Another girl constantly asks me, when I’m by myself, “How we doing?” I answer her with a smart-assed “We’re doing great, how are you guys” every single time and she just doesn’t get it.

2007-07-19T14:31:00.001-04:00

I started this post earlier and hated how it sounded. Here is the revised version.

Ed and I discussed the possibility of having more children last week.

I’ve always wanted 4. My mind has pretty much been made up since I was, like, 12. Ed isn’t opposed to actually having 4 children, but rather, the idea of having 4 children; the looks and the comments and the general stigma that seems to be cast upon people, in this day in age, who have more than 2 children. You know, the “what the hell is the matter with you” stigma.

It was just a quick conversation, nothing controversial, but it really got me thinking.

It has to be biology at work because although the logistics of having a third child right now would be ridiculous, when I even think about it for a second, I have an overwhelming desire to have another baby. I’m stressed to the limit with Eddie and Caitlyn being toddlers on their own, and outside of it all, introducing a newborn would be complete insanity. Then there’s the money……I pay $352 a week for daycare. We would need to make major life changes in order to add a third right now that would come down to one of us quitting our job and losing either money or health insurance. It’s not the right time at all, but the desire sure burns.

In the end, we decided to try for # 3 once Eddie is done with daycare, and we would like to get him in to public school when he is 4 (almost 5) instead of waiting until he is 5 (almost 6). I don’t want to be pregnant on my 30th birthday either, or nursing for that matter, because I am not the “pump and dump” kind of girl.

In the end this boils down to about a year or so of waiting. And if #4 comes after that, so be it.

As much as it is “the right” thing to do, I just don’t want to wait.

Sigh.

Questions, Questions

2007-07-16T14:24:00.000-04:00

1. I need a good eye cream. The bags and circles under my eyes are unbearable. Does anyone have any suggestions? I’d like to look so young and vibrant that people would think I was the baby sitter rather than the tired, tired mommy.

2. As far as skin goes in general, mine really sucks right now. My complexion has gone down the toilet since I had Cait, and more so since I went off the pill. While the acne is a small price to pay for the absence of migraines and severe hormonal fluctuation and actually having a sex life (I often joked that the pill didn’t work by stopping me from ovulating, it just plain turned me off to doing it..), something really needs to be done here. I tried Proactiv, no go. I’ve been using this antibacterial face bar and that’s not working either. Has anyone found the secret to a beautiful complexion? This week I’m trying the “chocolate gives you zits” theory and I’m not eating any. Which sucks. And it’s only 2:00 PM on Monday. Please, tell me what to do oh wise women of the blogosphere.

3. I also need a diet that works if you have one. I can’t stomach (haha pun absolutely intended) the feeling of being hungry. I hate not eating bread. I hate limiting myself in general. I considered for a brief second trying that new Alli supplement….that is until I read that if you should by some chance over indulge in fatty foods, an oily substance will leak out of your A-hole. I even told myself that the prospect of a greasy rectum would be enough of a deterrent to not eat any fat at all. Then I took a long hard look at myself (that means I thought about my impulsive personality for about 2 seconds) and decided that unless I was committed to ruining pants and unders because they most definitely would have grease stains, this was probably not a good idea. (BUT IT’S FDA APPROVED!!!) So anyway, if anyone has a plan that meets the criteria of being able to consume bread, never being hungry, and few limits in general, plus the absence of oily anus, I would sure love to hear about it.

**On a side note, I was quite proud of myself for only having a salad for lunch, with grilled chicken as opposed to crispy chicken. That is until I discovered that the dressing alone had 200 calories in it. Why can’t everything just be easy?!?!?! (ok, I just checked and the salad itself was 90 calories and the chicken was 120, so a 440 calorie lunch…not too bad I guess. All I had for breakfast was reduced sugar oatmeal and black coffee—90 calories)

4. I need to know why my button and zipper on these capris is on the wrong side. Like, the button is on the left. I posed this question to my co-workers. Someone thought that maybe they were actually MAN-pris, or capris for men, but I assured her they were women’s. Then I was asked if maybe I bought them in Canada…apparently Canada has some backward zipper policy that I am unaware of. In any case, I didn’t cross the border to get some capris. I bought them right here, at JC Penny in the “misses” section.

5. Why oh why oh why do men insist on showing their feet off in their “mandals”. I hate feet in general, but man feet are the worst. I beg all men to please keep their feet sheathed in their socks.

Girls on Motorcycles

2007-07-11T10:41:00.001-04:00

I remember taking a sociology class in college where it was stated that children are not predisposed to act a certain way based on their gender, but actually are molded to act like boys and girls by their parents pushing stereotypical gender based toys/clothes/shows (etc.) at them. Even back then, before having kids, I disagreed. I argued that a person is set up to be who they are regardless of gender and regardless of being given trucks or dolls to play with.

As a child, I had dolls and your basic girly toys, but I found them to be quite boring. Friends would often get upset with me because I would be all about setting up the Barbie house and furniture and arranging it just right, but I had no actual interest in playing Barbie’s. I hated dressing them up and making them talk or go out or whatever. How freaking lame, right? I didn’t want to play in a toy kitchen or use a fake vacuum (are you insane?). I liked playing make believe; I would pretend that I was camping with my stuffed animals, or that I was in a singing competition. Even at a young age I would just hang out and listen to music. I would have much rather played by myself than with a group of kids any day, and I was lucky to have a brother who was the same as me; content to chill or be by himself.

And guess what? I turned out ok! I’m not some kind of psychopath loner; I’m actually a good mom!

I admit that I put Caitlyn in dresses quite a bit, and dress her in pink and purple 98% of the time. I’ve bought her dolls and put her hair in pig tails. I’ve set her up to be the biggest princess there ever was. Despite what I have done, Caitlyn prefers to be dirty. She prefers Diego over Dora. She loves to dig and steal her brother’s trucks. She is loud and extremely outspoken (even at age 2). Regardless of what I dress her in, she always grabs her baseball cap and puts it on backwards. She also sets her stuffed animals around our table and feeds them and brings them milk. She wraps her babies in her blanket and lies them down and runs their backs. She pretends to cook in her little kitchen. I know that I’m doing something right with her because she feels free to be an individual and do her own thing, but she also has the desire to mimic me, and be a little mommy.

It’s hard to put Eddie’s personality in print. While he does all the things a typical boy is “supposed” to do (which include being dirty, loud, and maniacal at times) he is a truly sensitive soul. He’s 3 ½ now and still wants to curl up on my lap and twirl my hair. He likes to sit and have a conversation with you, and talk about his feelings. He carries a pink Dora backpack to school every day and doesn’t care. He sings and dances and loves to watch anything with music on TV. When they play dress up at school, the first thing he goes for is a denim skirt. And you know what? He plays trucks, pretends he is a monster, wrestles and loves to watch NASCAR with his dad. He likes nothing better than watching bulldozers do work.

I went outside last night to see what he and Grandpa were up to and he ran up to me and gave me a huge hug and a great big smile.

“I want to be just like you, Mommy” he says

“Me? How come?” (I think he’s about to tell me that I’m great)

“I want to wear dresses and be a girl.”

“You do?”

“Oh yeah, I want to wear dresses”

“Well, you’re already a boy and boys don’t really wear dresses.”

“Ok Mommy.”

He thinks for a minute.

“Well, can girls ride motorcycles?”

2007-07-09T16:11:00.001-04:00

Ugh. Yesterday.

I felt like such a bad Mom.

I swear to you I yelled all day at those kids. Screamed. Me. At them.

It was a bad, bad day.

At bed time, after numerous “time outs” Eddie and I were having a talk; I was sitting in his bed and we discussed why he should listen to me when I tell him to do something once. (like not to jump over the back of the love seat, roll on to the cushions and then on to the floor) I made a mistake and told him that he was acting like “bad Anthony”, a boy from his class. I had to apologize and tell him that it wasn’t a nice thing to say, not because Anthony isn’t bad (because he is hell on wheels) but because Anthony has a bad life with no daddy around and a Mommy who works a whole lot. I told him he was a good boy and that we’d had a hard day.

He looked me in the eyes, serious as anything.

“I know I’m good mommy. I try to teach Anthony how to be good. And I am really sick of you hollering all the time.”

Me too.

I didn’t sleep and cried most of the night.

My biggest fear is fucking my kids up.

Or that they’ll hate me when they are grown and look back.

I’m at a loss as to what to do; how to balance it all.

Both kids were sweet as pie this morning, but for me, it has been a very depressing day.

2007-07-08T14:10:00.000-04:00

I was laughing to myself (as I often do) the other day because Caitlyn has this adorable shirt that says "everyone loves a blue eyed girl" and her eyes are so not blue anymore. Isn't it weird? They are the most lovely shade of hazel that I have ever seen, grey and green with flecks of golden-brown. I was commenting to Ed yesterday that even when she wears blue, her eyes don't reflect it anymore. Then I downloaded this picture: (**edited to say [was I smoking crack? He eyes don't look blue at all.) Go ahead, enlarge the pictures. Hazel indeed.]

And this one too:

Where they look SO blue. You will also notice my newly laid kitchen floor, but please try not to notice the pieces of cat food strewn about.

We went to a wedding for Ed's cousin Karen yesterday and while I didn't take any pictures of the bride and groom, I did get 2 new pictures of my adorable niece Samantha who is nearly 3 months old. She has 2 idiots for parents, but she sure is a cute pumpkin.

We had a really nice day at the park (where the wedding was) and will probably book Cait's birthday party there as well. It was a really nice site.

I actually came up here to check my bank account to be sure that I can grocery shop, so I'm going to do that. I hear the kids waking up from their naps.....

8 Things You Previously Didn't Know About Me

2007-07-08T09:57:00.001-04:00

Ok, so The Flying Mum has tagged me for this 8 things meme. How ever did she know that I wanted to share 8 more things in addition to my 100? The rules are below, but I am not tagging anyone because for one, she tagged all those that I would have tagged, and two, I think the entire blogosphere has done this one now. But for the sake of rules, here they are, lifted from The Flying Mum who stole them from Beck.

A. Each player lists 8 facts/habits about themselves.

B. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning before those facts/habits are listed.

C. At the end of the post, the player then tags 8 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1. My most favorite food in all the world is Salmon. I could eat it every day in any fashion.

2. I am so excited about my vacation in September that I can hardly sleep at night. First off, I am off of work for 11 days in a row, but also, I just love New England. I have been reliving New Hampshire through our honeymoon pictures. My "new" profile pic is 5 years old, from our honeymoon.

3. Speaking of vacation, I would like to lose 20 lbs. before we go. (I would like to lose about 80 lbs. overall)

4. When I went to Ed's prom in 1995, my dress was a size 3.

5. I love to be in a swimming pool, but I am a horrible swimmer.

7. I never thought I would become so attached to this blog.

8. As much as I hate it that I need to wear glasses now, I think I look kind of cool with them on. Also, I left them downstairs, and I can barely see what I'm typing.

The 4th

2007-07-06T10:50:00.001-04:00

It was rainy and horrible here on the 4th, so thank God we had the sense to check the weather and find fireworks on the 3rd. We picked a good show (despite being kind of in the ghetto) and we were pleased that Eddie wasn't terrified this year. Caitlyn, though not hysterical, was not thrilled with all of the noise.

We spent the 4th setting up our fish tank and getting the fish accustomed to their new home. We got 7 fish, 2 for Caitlyn and 5 for Eddie. Caitlyn named hers One and Two and Eddie named 3 of his Santa, Grandpa and Daddy. That left the 2 black molly fish to be named, so we called them Sheeba, after our dead dog, and Molly for obvious reasons.

I was off of work yesterday and I took the kids to daycare and came home and slept until after noon. I can't eve remember the last time I slept so late. After lunch, I did some laundry and cleaned up a bit. I'm off again today, and Ed and I are going to The Cheesecake Factory for lunch after a while. I always get the same meal when we go, Herb Crusted Salmon with Asparagus and Smashed Potatoes, then I change up the cheesecake I order. Last time I got lemon raspberry which was to die for. The time before that, Tira Misu (I have no idea how to spell that). I'll keep you updated as to what I get today.

My first Children's Place order arrived yesterday, and the crabby shirt is all I wanted and more. One of the tanks I got for Eddie (I ordered him all XS-4 rather than 4T with the hope that he could wear them next year too) was super huge, but the other 2 will be perfect. The crinkle skirts for Caitlyn are supercute but to keep them crinkled, you have to twist them up, tie them in a not and rubber band them after you wash them...which is probably too much maintenance for me. I'm still waiting on my second order which includes some shorts and a hat for Eddie, then 2 more shirts ad shorts plus sunglasses for Cait. I'm getting nervous because the website doesn't show that it's shipped yet.

I need to end this because I left my glasses downstairs and I can't see anything. I'm thinking of getting a new cell phone today, but we'll see how that goes. I'm eligible for a free one, but don't want to sign a contract. I don't know.

Muffins

2007-07-02T22:13:00.000-04:00

I was totally going to make Sarah'scookies tonight, but when I came home to 5 over-ripe bananas, I decided on muffins instead.

Yes, banana muffins it was.

They were good, too.

Rock City

2007-07-02T14:53:00.000-04:00

Last night was such a gorgeous night; cool and clear with a perfect breeze. It reminded me so much of the mountain air when we were in New Hampshire for our honeymoon, that I was taken aback for a few minutes. My fondest memory of our time there was swimming in our resort’s glorious heated outdoor pool in the moonlight and the crisp mountain air. It was September and while during the day it was about 70 degrees, the evenings were in the upper 40s. The entire trip was amazing, but when I start thinking about it, the nights are the first thing to come to mind.

We’ll have been married for 5 years this coming September, and as it happens, we’ll be going back to The White Mountains of New Hampshire. I’m so excited about it that I can hardly contain myself. While our original plan was to go to Maine to visit our friend Melissa, we’ve slowly been migrating toward taking the kids to do the things we enjoyed when we were there. We may go to Maine for a day, but the deals in NH that time of year, 1 week before their peak fall foliage season begins are phenomenal. I don’t know how I’ll make it through the next 2 months because I seriously just want to go right now.

We happened to have an amazing time on Saturday. The rock formations were just gorgeous and it was a beautiful (if not a little bit cool) sunny day. The path was just a tiny bit treacherous, with some deep crevices and a few cliffs, but we kept a good hold of the kids, and they were just beside themselves with all of the rocks and caves…..and they had to sit on every bench we came across.

We ate our picnic lunch and went through the store before leaving, and then stopped in Ellicottville where they had a teeny tiny craft show on the way home. We ended up being home by about 3:30 and grilled some pork and were all in bed early which was so needed after the long day we had.

The day’s only downside was coming home to find that we had received a letter from our insurance company stating that they would not be covering Ed’s tonsillectomy because it was not deemed to be medically necessary. You know, like he just got up one day and said “I’d sure like t have my tonsils out. What the hell. This is the same insurance company who denied his going to an ambulatory care center when his tonsils had swelled so large that he couldn’t breathe. You know, it probably wasn’t important, and he probably didn’t need to have them out. All that I know is that this really sucks. We have to go through an appeal process and if they don’t pay it….I don’t know what we’ll do.

Anyhoo….

Ed got up early yesterday to go to work, and at about 5:30AM Eddie came to let me know that he’d peed in his bed. I changed him and he crawled in bed with me, and we slept in until 8:30!! It was great to sleep in, but ended up being just about the only great thing of the day. The kids were maniacs. I don’t know what got in to them. They were just absolutely crazy, I took them for haircuts, we went to the grocery store, and I don’t even know…they were just very high maintenance. And my saint of a husband, upon coming home and seeing me frazzled, sent me to Starbucks to catch a few minutes by myself. Wonderful man. (The catch was that I had to stop and by a thermometer for our fridge, which was still acting up but I didn’t really care. Incidentally, our freezer was at 28 degrees, not nearly cold enough, and the fridge was at 55 degrees…..so we ended up putting what we could in a cooler and the rest in the fridge in the garage and completely defrosting the whole thing. As of this morning it was working great, fridge at 40 degrees and freezer at -10 degrees. Oh, and by the way [#2] you know how I was paranoid about the downstairs freezer…..it ended up being open when I went down there yesterday. Can you even believe it!! All of my freaking out wasn’t for nothing!!)

Ed’s dad ended up taking the kids out for a while last night too, so I was able to straighten up and cook dinner in peace. I normally make my own garlic bread, but I happened to buy Pepperidge Farm’s roasted garlic premium garlic bread and let me tell you it was TO.DIE.FOR. Yummy Yummy.

This has become an extraordinarily long entry, so I’ll end here. Work is super busy and even though I haven’t officially taken a lunch break there is much to be done.

~Sigh~

For the record

2007-06-29T22:19:00.000-04:00

I think that it really sucks that the season finale of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip was also the series finale.

People need to start watching the good stuff so it doesn't get canceled.

2007-06-29T15:10:00.001-04:00

Ok, well thanks to this:

And some retail therapy suggested by Swistle, my day ended up being much better yesterday. Any time I can spend $22.43 and get 2 shirts, 2 skirts and a bathing suit for Cait plus 3 muscle shirts for Eddie is a great day. That averages out to $2.49 per item!!!

Our fridge is being crazy though and it’s kind of making me crazy. I’m pretty sure that the problem is actually our freezer, which somehow has this solid wall of ice on the interior back wall, and while the previously frozen items are still frozen all of my fudgecicles were liquefied and my ground beef was spongy. So I spent an hour last night hauling food from upstairs to my basement freezer. I hope that Ed has a chance to look at it today. This all makes me very uncomfortable, having all of my eggs in one basket, or, er, having all of my meat in one freezer. I kept going downstairs last night to make sure that the freezer door wasn’t left open or something. I’m so paranoid that I’m going to lose all of my food. Very OCD, I know.

Today started out really crappy when I spilled my iced coffee all over me. It could have been worse though, could have been hot. Then I had some AWESOME chicken fingers for lunch…so it’s all good. Plus it’s Friday……

We are still very much looking forward to our picnic tomorrow. I’ll be sure to take tons of pictures.

Lick the Buffalo

2007-06-28T12:39:00.001-04:00

Is it ever acceptable to drink at work? If it wasn't before, I think today might be the day.

Mojitos anyone???

If it weren't for Swistle, I don't think I would have made it past noon.

Except now I really want some cookie dough.

At least I can laugh about the customer who called me a scumbag piece of shit.

But I still really hate my job today.

I am actually really excited about going to this glacial park that's about 2 hours away on Saturday. We're packing a picnic and heading out early. It's supposed to be a really cool place, where you can climb on the rocks. There's a mile long trail through the glacial shelf (or something like that). Eddie is really excited and keeps asking me if we're going on our picnic today. Yesterday, after school, he said to me "I have a great idea about our picnic Mommy.."

"What is it?"

"Maybe we can have our picnic on the rocks instead of at a picnic table!!"

"That sounds like a great idea. We'll have to check it out!"

It amazes me that he is such a different kid than he was at this time last year. Last year, when we told him we were going to "The Taste of Buffalo", he looked at me confused and said "Will we eat the buffalo??" He thought about it for a long time after I told him that we wouldn't be eating buffalo. "Will we just lick them?", he asked.

And somehow, remembering that, my day just got better.